Tag Archives: charensat

Sunday 25th October 2015 – I’VE RARELY SEEN …

… such a one-sided football match as this. It wasn’t that Charensat were any good because they weren’t – it’s just that Pionsat were so flaming awful. For the first half, the whole team was asleep – their bodies were out on the pitch but the rest of them were miles away. For the second half, three or four of them managed to wake up and it was slightly better, but equally, three or four could have stayed in the dressing room for all the good that they did and no-one would have missed them. Pionsat, relegated from the 1st Division last season, are going to be spending several long, cold winters in Divison 2 if they can’t get it together.

Time and time again, Charensat swarmed right through the Pionsat defence as if it wasn’t there (which it wasn’t) and there were about 20 one-on-ones with Matthieu in the Pionsat goal. A few he saved, but by far the most of them were ballooned miles over the bar or miles wide of the post. The Charensat finishing was appalling. On one occasion Pionsat’s defence, such as it was, stayed around arguing with the linesman for not giving an offside instead of following up the ball while two of the Charensat players beamed down on Matthieu. He saved the first shot and had his defence been playing like grown-ups they would have intercepted the loose ball at the very least. But instead, the ball fell kindly to the other Charensat player, who blasted it about 30 feet over the bar, unmarked from about 10 yards out. This was totally embarrassing, from both teams’ points of view.

In fact several Pionsat players spent so much time arguing with the ref and the linesman instead of following the ball and it was totally unnecessary. Players of Pionsat’s experience should know better. In fact, one of Pionsat’s attackers, too busy arguing with the ref instead of concentrating on the game, was caught offside in what would have been a marvellous attacking position had he been paying attention.

Charensat did score one goal, and how they were limited to one is totally beyond me. They were completely in control of this match. And then we had the totally unbelievable. Matthieu kicked a long high ball right out of the area high up front. Cedric leapt up and headed it on over the defence, and Nico, running on, lobbed it over the keeper for the equaliser. The ball didn’t touch the ground until it was in the back of the net.

But like I said earlier, it’s going to be a long hard couple of years for Pionsat.

Now this morning, I would have had a lovely night’s long sleep except that Bane of Britain somehow confused things so that the reminder for the radio programmes went off this morning instead of tomorrow morning.

And I was on my travels too. I’d been in the far north of Labrador in a vehicle which was like a “Bigfoot” but with a car body of the late 1940s and how that cruised over the uneven roads. Back in civilisation I’d met up with Nerina again and we’d spent a while in a cheap hotel in some dingy town before I had to leave. Given the price of the return ticket on public transport, I went to the darker side of town to buy a really cheap car (I actually did this once in 1995 when I was in London and ended up with a £70 Ford Cortina instead of a Eurostar ticket, and on another occasion it was cheaper to hire a car and put the petrol in to drive from London to Bath rather than pay the fare for the train). Anyway, we had a good look around all of this area at the cheap cars for sale and one of the vehicles at which I was looking was a BMC MG-1300 in white and pale green. I was wondering whether I should ask her if she still had her Wolseley but I decided that it was best not to sho too much interest.

After breakfast I had a relax and didn’t do too much at all. But by about 13:30 the temperature in the verandah was 19°C, the temperature in the 12-volt immersion heater was 36°C thanks to the sun that we had and thus the fully-charged batteries, and so I had a tepid shower in the corner of the verandah with the warm water and a jug. And nice it was too, especially now that I have clean clothes too.

Still plenty of time before I needed to go and so I cut my hair and made myself some butties, and then I was off to Charensat.

After the football match I went round to Liz and Terry’s to rehearse the radio programmes that we will be recording.

viaduc des fades gorges de la sioule puy de dome franceThe way that I went is not a road that I take very often. It’s from St Priest down to the Barrage des Fades and for the first time today I noticed that at a certain spot there’s a stunning view of the Gorges de la Sioule and also of the Viaduc des Fades from an angle from which I’ve never seen it before.

We did what we had to and Liz made a beautiful vegan meal complete with ginger cake, and Terry and I made a few plans.

Back here, I haven’t done much and I’ll be having an early night. We have a lot to do tomorrow.

Sunday 8th December 2013 – JUST FOR A CHANGE …

… I saw Pionsat’s 2nd XI go a goal down early in a game (that’s not really a change), but come back strongly and score three times in the second half to win 3-1 to get their show back on the road.

But never mind that for a moment – this morning started as I meant to go on, by dropping my breakfast tray and all its contents all over the floor downstairs. I’d had a nice sleep too – an early night, a lie-in until 10:30 without any inerruption through the night, a good dream, and then the bright burning sun shining in through the windows. And then of course the breakfast all over the floor.

I managed an hour or two catching up on some recording that I needed to do, and then in the glorious sunshine off to Charensat to see the footy at 13:00.

Pionsat had 11 players, but no more, and it was a fair team too, and as I said, they ran out winners 3-1 after being down 1-0 for a long period in the game.

It was particularly important for young Vincent. He came up from the juniors last year and he’s finding it something of a big step up, but he’s doing what he can and he showed that if you have a genuine striker’s instinct, then nothing much else really matters all that much.

vincent malnar football club de foot fc pionsat st hilaire as charensat 8 decembre 2013 puy de dome league division 4 franceHere, a high ball into the area had the keeper stretching and … he dropped it. It’s not easy hanging on to a ball in this cold weather with the sun streaming into your eyes.

And there was Vincent, following the ball in like every good striker should, whether he thinks he’s going to get it or not, and when the keeper fumbles the ball, it lands right at Vincent’s feet and that was 3-1 to Pionsat.

Back here, I finished off the recording and then watched the Packers against the Falcons. The Packers came back to scrape a dour win, having fallen behind to the most bizarre touchdown that I have ever seen. The Pachers’ quarterback overthrows, a Falcons defender sticks out a hopeful foot, and kicks it right into the hands of a colleague wide open on the left wing, who, totally unmarked, runs it back 72 yards for a touchdown. The Falcons won’t ever do that again, that’s for sure.

Sunday 17th November 2013 – NO FOOTY … GRRRRRR!

And I checked before setting out, too. I rang up Fabien who has now taken over the running of FC Pionsat St Hilaire from Bernard, so I am given to understand, and he said at first that today’s 2nd XI match at Charensat was on. But shortly afterwards, he rang back to say that following a mid-morning pitch inspection, the game was off.

Seeing as it was Sunday, I wasn’t feeling too much like a 13:00 start anyway, especially as I didn’t crawl out of bed until abou 10:30. So that was the cue for a leisurely morning.

The afternoon gave me several possibilities – I could see if there were any clubs in the vicinity (Le Quartier, the Goatslayers, St Maurice etc) were playing, or whether Terjat or St Marcel’s matches were on, or else I could stay in and do the rock programmes for Radio Anglais. Common sense and logic suggested that I did the radio programmes and so for once, I took my own best advice (not like me, I know) and dashed out January’s rock music. So that’s out of the way.

This evening I was summoned to appear chez Liz and Terry so that Liz and I could do the rehearsals for our recordings on Friday, and I could have a quick glance at the Fiat Punto that has ground to a shuddering halt (might possibly be that a big end cap has come off, although it’s significant that it started to go wrong after a local garage changed the water punp – has someone dropped a bolt or a spanner down a waterway?)

Liz also sprung a surprise on me – could I help her translate some technical information about the work that is done in a casting foundry. That 18 months I spent in an in-depth study of the evidence of the Tay Bridge disaster, during which about 100 pages was spent in discussing foundry practice and principles, stood me in good stead here, that’s for sure. And I’m not really complaining because Liz also sprung on me an apple crumble and vegan custard together with a doggy bag to take home, as well as another supply of vegan cheese from the UK.

On the way there though, I noticed rather ominously that the sides of the Puy-de-Dome, the Mont Dore and the Puy de Sancy are well-covered in snow. Winter is drawing inexorably closer with every day.

I’m also having a little change of procedure about the bateries in the barn right now. As you know, the charge controller has packed up in there (the second in as many years) so I’m by-passing the charge controller with a flying lead with crocodile clips on each end. Anyway, the battery that I’m using is fully-charged and I don’t want to overcharge it by leaving it coupled up all day, but before all of these charge control issues there were three batteries that were, well, not too bad, and they gradually lost their charge in the absence of a charge conroller.

What I’m doing then is to charge up for just half an hour the battery that’s there, and then swap over the charge to the three precious ones. If we have a good week or so of decent weather it might actually put some charge in them. Who knows? But it’s worth a try.

Sunday 27th March 2011 – Today I saw…

…the worst football match that I have ever seen in my life.

I drove all the way to St Avit to watch Pionsat’s 3rd XI but when I arrived there I found that the match had been cancelled. And it was pointless going back all the way to Pionsat to watch the 2nd XI – I’d have missed the first half and then I would have to drive halfway back to see Liz and Terry. However I did see some action at Charensat’s ground and so I stopped off there, to see them play Marcillat in a 3rd Division game.

In the first half the score was 0-0, and the teams were lucky to get nil it was so dreadful. In the second half Charensat opened the scoring. The Marcillat keeper’s kicking was pretty dreadful and so after a while the captain decides to take the goal kicks. For his first effort he kicks it all of 15 yards, right to a Charensat forward who prompty volleys it right back into the goal.

Charensat’s second comes from a corner. A ball played right across the goal with everyone standing there watching it except for a Charensat attacker on the far post who just stoops to head it in. Simple.

And Marcillat pull a goal back. A harmless cross into the penalty area with no-one on the other side, and the Charensat keeper, for reasons known only to himself, puts in a really acrobatic climb-cum-twist and I’m still not sure how he did it, and he palms the ball into his own net.

With just minutes to go, a foul is committed and the ref gives it in the favour of Marcillat, even though he was the only one who reckoned it was in that direction. The Charensat trainer tells the ref what he thought of the decision, and the ref tells the trainer what he thinks of the Charensat trainer. The Charensat defence are arguing amongst themselves and still argue as the ref blows his whistle and they still argue as the ball is played over the top of them to an unmarked Marcillat attacker who heads into an empty net.

Marcillat, easily the worst team I have ever seen, have been let out of jail in no uncertain terms.

And it gets worse.

Charensat have a striker called Guillaume who is quick, speedy, skilful, with good ball control, and if he broke through the Marcillat defence once he did it a dozen times. And faced with innumerable 1-on-1s with a shaky Marcillat keeper, he blasted it over the bar every time. And with 50 seconds remaining, he’s through again, two yards out, the best chance of the game, and he blasts it 5 yards over. His trainer’s language is unprintable in what is a family show like this. It was appalling, but then again, so was the miss.

At Liz and Terry’s I was kindly wined and dined, and we rehearsed our radio programme. We are in the studio on Tuesday.

And it’s rained and rained all day too. 

Sunday 11th April 2010 – What a good weekend …

… for the footy.

Last night, Pionsat’s 3rd XI lost 6-1 to Manzat. Not very impressive you might think but Manzat are top of the league by a country mile and beat one of the other teams in the division 14-1 the other day, and they have recorded several wins where they have scored in double figures. 6-1 is a good result.

fcpsh fc pionsat st hilaire st gervais d'auvergne puy de dome ligue football league franceAt 13:00 the 1st XI travelled down the road to take on hated local rivals St Gervais d’Auvergne and defeated them comfortably 2-0 and that in itself is astonishing (here is Nico scoring the team’s – and his – first of the two).

Even more surprising is that they played the latter part of the match with just 10 men. but even so they never really looked in any serious danger

fcpsh fc pionsat st hilaire charensat puy de dome ligue football league franceThat match finished at 14:45 and just 15kms away the 2nd XI were playing against Charensat – kickoff 15:00 so I had a hectic drive through the lanes.

Now there’s a goalkeeping crisis again at Pionsat as they currently have two keepers out injured and Philippe had been called out of retirement to keep goal for the 2nd XI. But he hadn’t turned up and with no other volunteer Christophe was “persuaded” to go between the posts.

fcpsh fc pionsat st hilaire charensat puy de dome ligue football league franceNow he’s the first to admit that he’s no keeper and he let in two goals that maybe some other keeper might have kept out. But he made up for that by having excellent positional sense, excellent timing, quick reactions and a good deal of bravery.

He can be quite pleased with what he accomplished today especially as up at the other end Pionsat scored three times to win the match! Well done Christophe!

After that I went round to see Liz and Terry but they were out. Simon was there doing some plastering so we had a good chat and then I came home. I was sorry to have missed them as I had had need of Liz, in her role as the “Auvergne Snake Murderer”, this morning. Moving a pile of damp and rotting wood I put my hand about half an inch away from a viper. Luckily my reactions were quicker than his!

Saturday 3rd April 2010 – I didn’t feel much like it this morning.

I woke up with the alarm, just by way of a change, and heard the rain pouring down on the roof (15mm we had today). What a way to start the day! So after a while of vegetating I heaved myself out of bed and set off for Montlucon. Late

At Carrefour they were selling baby lettuce plants – €1:95 for 12 and that’s a bargain so I bought two dozen seeing as mine haven’t taken yet.

I also went to the huge sports shop – Decathlon – to buy some football boots. But firstly they were mostly sold out of the popular sizes. I tried on a couple of pairs of boots my size but they weren’t half tight and pinched my feet like mad so I asked the footwear assistant which ones she recommended for wider feet.
“How should I know?” was her helpful reply. “You’ll just have to try them all on and find out”.
As if I don’t have anything better to do! So that’s Decathlon crossed of my shopping list with their crap customer service.

Noz was quite interesting and I spent a few bob in there too – nothing special (except a proper tray small enough to go through the door downstairs amd with high edges to stop me spilling stuff). There were a few good films – an old black and white Study in Scarlet and a copy of Douglas Fairbanks’ silent movie The Three Musketeers. I passed on the obviously interesting and highly relevant Women In Cages and the astonishing “Dracula in Pakistan”. “A rare film from the archives of Hollywood” it said in the trailer. Well, what more can anyone say?

Next stop of course was the Auchan and I was behind a woman who had spent almost €200 at the checkouts. she couldn’t find her carte de fidelite so she said to the cashier “Put the points on that gentleman’s card” – meaning me! That’s not something that happens every day either.

At Brico Depot I had an encounter with a woman and her daughter. They were looking at dowelling and just happened to catch me on the head with a length.
“Look out!” cried the daughter to her mother. “You’ve just given that man a coup de baguette“.
“It’s okay” I replied. “I used to be married”.
“Ahhh” said the mother. “You’ll know all about coups de baguette then”.
Now my sense of humour has been described as “special” and so I was absolutely astonished to find anyone – let alone a French woman – who was on my wavelength. And imagine my further astonishment when 10 minutes later I collided with the same females.
“We meet again” said Mum
“Yes” I replied. And if you are still here in 15 minutes you can help me load my van!” I was rather loaded up with wood at the time.

But who should I bump into but Simon who was also looking for wood. It’s nice to meet friends and have interesting chats, but why just then? I was onto something with that woman I was sure.

But anyway Simon helped me load up Caliburn and we had a coffee together afterwards.

I told him about my adventures in the swimming pool last week and explained that I was off there right then, so he made sure I had his mobile phone number in case there was another swimming match.

I went to the baths via Virlet to pick up the village’s defibrilator (you never know – there might have been a swimming gala again) and I was half expecting to see a heavy contingent of medical personnel and a tonne of ice ready to dump into the swimming pool in case the water boiled, but no – my luck wasn’t in and I just had a quiet swim with the usual 20 or 30 people who go there.

But there is a swimming gala on Sunday afternoon 11th April. Unfortunately for me Pionsat are playing away so I shall either be at St Gervais or Charensat. But if anyone would like to join me for a rain dance on the Saturday night they will be more than welcome.

Sunday 29th November 2009 – I should have gone …

… to Manzat today to see the 3rd XI play against the home side. In fact at 14:00 I got myself ready to go, and just before leaving I had a final glance at the itinerary, only to see that kick-off was at 13:00, not 15:00 as I had thought. Ahhh well.

fcpsh football club de foot pionsat st hilaire charensatBut to make up for it, here’s a pic of the footy from last night when Pionsat gave Charensat a good spanking.

And so, due to the pouring rain that we were having, I stayed in today and worked on a pile of photos and a pile of dictated notes that had accumulated over the last couple of months, in the hope that I could finally get myself up to date.

And that was it, really. I didn’t do anything else. For once in a while it’s nice to have a lazy day and do nothing at all.

Saturday 28th November 2009 – I had a nice surprise this evening.

pierre dupoux 21st birthday pionsatNot quite as nice as the surprise Pierre had, but nice enough none-the-less.

There I was, quietly watching the football like I do, when Elodie (the young girl who works at Auchan and who persons the Pie Hut at the football ground) whispered in my little pointy ear “it’s Pierre (the footballer who works at Brico Depot)’s 21st birthday today and we’re having a surprise party for him after the game. Would you like to come?”

Now I don’t do social occasions as you know but firstly Elodie invited me and I think she’s cute. I have a little soft spot for her (her mother has a soft spot for me as well – in her case it’s the Goodwin Sands but I digress) and secondly it’s nice to be invited to close social arrangements in the village such as this. It’s not quite “come to my house and sleep with my daughter” but that will surely come. Give me another 50 years or so.

pointing stone wall liz terry messenger sauret besserve puy de dome franceWe were about 10 or 12 at Liz and Terry’s and did quite a bit of pointing although we didn’t go up to the top of the scaffolding – not with this howling gale that was blowing around. I spent most of the day pulling a primeval forest out of the cracks in the stonework.

We did tons of work – mostly in the morning. In the afternoon things went slower due to the extra weight that we were carrying. The food was gorgeous as usual.

And as suspected, no-one said anything to me at all about “witness X”. Isn’t that a surprise?

Talking of the football, I remember saying that Pionsat’s 2nd XI wouldn’t find it so easy in the 2nd Division as they did in the 3rd last season and the thrashing that they received on the opening day of the season went to reinforce that opinion. But tonight I have seen the worst team that I have seen for a while (anything in Division 4 excepted) and how Pionsat only scored 5 and how they let Charensat score 2 is a mystery that will stay with me for ever.

fcpsh football club de foot pionsat st hilaire st gervais d'auvergneThe 1st XI played hated local rivals St Gervais and drew 4-4 in a match that was filled with scandal, controversy, dubious tactics, dubious decisions and a sending-off for a headbutt. It was freezing cold all evening with this piercing wind
(“what did you say?” – ed)
(“piercing – what did you think I said?”)
but the action on the pitch warmed up the pretty large and voiciferous crowd, and of course a good time was had by all. Nothing like a bit of excitement and controversy to liven up a freezing cold Saturday evening.

Friday 27th November 2009 – I’ve finished knocking down the wall today.

demolished wall bedroom les guis virlet puy de dome franceIt took me longer than anticipated as I took my time doing it. It’s made of large hollow lightweight bricks and it occurred to me that with having to build retaining walls outside as Krys wants me to, a supply of large hollow lightweight bricks might come in handy.

I’ve salvaged about 50 of them and put them to one side.

This afternoon I’ve fitted the insulation to the stud walls at the head of the stairs – it’s made a difference to the sound travelling through the walls so it has undoubtedly made a difference to the thermal qualities. And just as well, too. The temperature has fallen dramatically and I was obliged to put the heater on for an hour tonight – the first time in two weeks.

I dunno what kind of weird sense of humour people have round here. If you look at the wall under the stairs you’ll see the wallpaper from about 100 years ago. This house is built of stone and then someone plastered over the stone – and then lined the plaster with stone-patterned wallpaper. Why didn’t they simply forego the plastering?

hammer and sickle carved on wall les guis virlet puy de dome franceAnd not only that either. When I scraped off some of the wallpaper to see what it was like underneath, I came across a hammer and sickle insignia crudely carved into the plaster on the wall. I wonder what that’s all about? It’s something else that strikes me as totally weird in this place – we’ve discussed sacrificial chickens embedded in the concrete before now.

I’ve rescued all of my pointing tools and given them a good clean. Apparently we are all pointing at Liz and Terry’s chantier tomorrow. But I hope the weather is better than it has been for the last few days. Nothing but miserable grey skies and rain. The clothes I washed have been rinsed innumerable times by the heavens but the could really do with drying.

And we have two footy matches tomorrow night – the 1st XI against hated local rivals St Gervais d’Auvergne and the 2nd XI against hated local rivals Charensat. A large crowd is assured (if the weather is half-decent) so just you watch the hotel next door close its doors right on the final whistle. No wonder they can’t make any money.