Tag Archives: caliburn advertising

Saturday 22nd April 2017 – WORDS DON’T EXIST …

football La Brehalaise A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti ligue 4 district du manche Brehal normandy france… in the dictionary to describe the football that was on offer this evening down the road in Brehal.

I had the choice to go and watch US Granville in action against Lorient II but decided to come here to arural football match as it’s bound to be more intimate.

However, we were a “crowd” – it that’s the correct term to use, of just four here in the stadium to watch La Brehalaise III tackle A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti in a match from the Manche League Division 4, and there is no Division lower than this.

football La Brehalaise A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti ligue 4 district du manche Brehal normandy franceI’d seen in the schedule of results that despite their mid-table position, La Brehalaise had demolished a couple of other teams, scoring 9 and 10 goals here and there.

But I wonder what on earth they must have been like, because I couldn’t find the words to describe the football here tonight.

Dreadful was something of an understatement. It was like watching kids in Junior school running around in the playground in some kind of aimless chase after the ball.

From the kickoff, Brehal had a shot on goal – quite a soft shot as it happened, but the A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti keeper failed to stop it going through his hands, failed to grab it as it rebounded (twice) off his body, missed it as he dived for the loose ball, and it was cleared away by his defenders.

That would have been the clue for the Brehal players to pepper the goal with shots from just about everywhere but for the next 85 minutes, they had just three shots, not one of which went anywhere near the goal.

They had a centre-forward who insisted on hanging onto the ball at every opportunity instead of passing, and I don’t know whether one of the wingers had stolen his wife or something, but whenever the winger worked his way into a good position to receive the ball, the centre-forward turned his back on him and looked in the opposite direction.

It was no surprise that at half-time, A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti went into the dressing room 2-0 up. I can’t remember the goals now but they were simple efforts that had come about by the defence of La Brehalaise falling asleep.

female linesman football La Brehalaise A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti ligue 4 district du manche Brehal normandy franceNow here’s a thing that you don’t see every day.

Each team has to supply its own linesman and A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti came with a female linesman, or lineswoman … "try “linesperson”" – ed.

But one thing that we didn’t have was a pie hut. How can you possibly have a French social occasion without a buvette? I shan’t be going there again!

The second half started off again and we were treated to a superb goal from A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti. A free kick right around the defensive wall and despite a magnificent dive from the keeper, there we were.

After that, A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti seemed to switch off and they almost came undone because in the dying minutes of the game we had two breakaways upfield from La Brehalaise and they scored two goals from one-on-ones with the A.S. Montaigu Les Bois La Blouti keeper.

How things could have been different if they had attacked the goal from the start.

As for my start, it was another early one. 06:00 in fact. And after breakfast I cracked on with more stuff that needed doing.

That took me up until midday or so when I headed to Granville and the LeClerc for a pile of shopping, and the boulangerie over the road for bread for the weekend.

plage coudeville sur mer manche normandy franceOnce I’d bought what I needed, I headed for the seaside. Today was Coudeville-Plage, just down the road at Coudeville-sur-Mer, which is another one of those “sur mer” towns stranded a couple of miles from the sea due to the silting up of the coast.

The weather had changed today too. It was rather cloudy and overcast – nothing like the beautiful week that we had just had since I’ve been back.

granville plage coudeville sur mer manche normandy franceI could sit and eat my butty on a bench situated on top of a dune and I was quite comfortable here. There wasn’t as much wind about as over the last couple of days.

There was a good view of Granville away over there in ste distance, and you can see that dismal building at Donville les Bains where I went to see that dreadful studio.

You might have forgotten about that one – after all, I have seen so many ruins – but I haven’t.

iles de chausey plage coudeville sur mer manche normandy franceRight in front of me, away in the distance were the Iles de Chausey – an archipelago of which there are more at low tide than at high tide. Closely related to the Channel Islands further up, they were kept out of English hands by having been given to the monks of Mont St Michel in 1022, prior to the Norman conquest of England.

While I was busy admiring the view, Liz and Terry turned up and we went for a walk and a coffee (or two) along the promenade and watched all the people. The weather cleared up a little too, which was nice.

When I returned to Caliburn I had quite a surprise.

Someone had left a note on the windscreen wanting to talk about wind turbines. So I now have an appointment for Monday. As I have said before … "and you will say again" – ed … this vehicle advertising really works.

But despite my carping about the standard of play at the football this evening, I am the first to be aware that I have had a free evening’s entertainment thanks to the players and officials who turned out for the match, and I am very grateful.

Monday 31st March 2014 – I WASN’T SO GOOD …

… at getting up today. It took a great deal of effort to haul myself out of bed, but once I was out, I wasn’t so bad.

After the customary couple of hours on the web site, I went outside. This furniture removal is now postponed until tomorrow so I had a look at a couple of petrol-engined appliances that had been hanging around here for a couple of months.

Of course, they didn’t work and so I wen into Pionsat for some clean fuel. I also nipped to Cecile’s as apparently there was a bird stuck in the window.I was too late for the bird unfortunately and I can’t take it out as it’s fallen behind some shutterings that we spent a day or so fitting, and I didn’t have the tools with me.

Back here, giving everything a clean and draining out the fuel tanks and carburettors and the like, I finally got everything to work and I even managed to mow a bit of grass.

The new plastic greenhouse thingy is erected and I’ve put the pots with the courgette seeds in it, those that I potted last week, and also the shrubs that I bought. And while I may not have carrots and parsnips and radish, or even courgetttes, the garlic is going well, and the onions and shallots are close behind.

I fell asleep again at lunchtime but when I finally did make it outside, I did another raised bed. I must push on with those.

But I also had a visitor. Someone at the footy had seen me – or, rather, Caliburn, and he made an effort to track me down as on his farm he has a wind turbine that hasn’t been functionning for a few years and he wondered if I could get it to work for him.

So that’s another half-day out when we have some wind. This vehicle advertising really pays.

Saturday 20th August 2011 – So having found my camera …

… I can post photos again.

pointing fieldstone wall lean to les guis virlet puy de dome franceThis is not Thursday night’s photo but Friday night’s, where you can see how high I am up the wall here. As you know, I was hoping to finish it all before I go away but what with one thing and another I had to revise my target to just half of the all.

And so there’s not much more to do up there now and I’m hoping that at least that part of the wall will be finished long before next weekend.

Mind you, it would have been nice to have it done before I go to Canada.

This morning the heat drove me out of bed fairly early and so I’ve been tidying again. I’m not sure how it is that I can make this place so untidy so quickly.

At lunchtime I went to Commentry but didn’t buy anything worthwhile except some new AA and AAA batteries to take with me to Canada. But I did hear on the news that here in the Puy-de-Dome we are on “Red Alert” for la canicule – the heatwave. And that’s not surprising.

In the pool at Neris les Bains, everyone else must have heard about la canicule because there were more people in the water there than there were in the water after the sinking of the Titanic. You could hardly move. But in something of a surprise, the lifeguard came over to talk to me about solar panels. Either he had seen Caliburn, of else the advertising on the side of my holdall. I always take that down to the pool and leave it with the advertising facing the people in the water. I can’t emphasise enough – the three steps to a successful business are “advertising”, “advertising” and “advertising”.

The water in the solar shower was 45°C when I returned home. The 12-volt immersion heater was at 57°C and so even though it was late, I did another load of washing. I reckon that one more load of washing just before I go away and that will be me organised.

But it ain’t ‘arf ‘ot, mum.

Saturday 6th August 2011 – I didn’t think much of today.

I was up early yet again – I dunno what’s happened just recently – but seeing as it’s Saturday I had a nice leisurely morning doing not very much.

This afternoon I went shopping – to Commentry as it happens – and just for a change I spent nothing above what would normally spend during a budget-shopping outing. They didn’t even have one of the gutter ends that I wanted.

But I was importuned on the LIDL Car Park and a lengthy chat about wind turbines ensued. I can’t say it often enough – vehicle advertising seems to work for me, and work for me in spades.

It was cold in the pool in Neris les Bains – it’s been a cloudy muggy day (right now we are having torrential rainstorms of quite a violent kind) and yet they had the sides of the pool open. I don’t understand that. And the lock on the closed shower is broken too – that means I have to shower in the full public gaze and so can’t have my customary “plumbing the depths” type of shower.

20 laps of the pool wore me out though and in the middle of watching a film and drinking my coffee I crashed right out again, and it wasn’t until 23:50 that I came round again. I probably won’t sleep now and I’ve been cleaning all of my SD cards ready to take them to Canada at the end of the month. Things are proceeding apace.

Saturday 30th July 2011 – Do you realise …

… that the next time that I do a monthly mega-shop, I shall be doing it in Montreal? I didn’t realise until I was on my way home from Montlucon where I have been today.

Yes, supplies are running low here and so it was time that I did a monthly mega-shop for all of the tinned stuff, the health food supplies and the like. And I spent over €100 with not very much to show for it either – no toys or anything. But at least the cupboards are no longer bare and I’ll be able to eat for the next month.

At Brico Depot (and I haven’t been there for ages either) I bought all of the tags for the shelving units that I bought in the IKEA sale. Even more exciting, they had 300mm pine planks on sale too, just what I need for the shelving units. A good idea to go there, it was.

On the way back I went to Neris les Bains and had a good swim and a shower. Summer is finally back again. And it was quite pleasant in there too and now I am clean – at least on the outside.

This evening I’ve made a start on packing for Canada. The most important thing to take is the music – I can’t go anywhere without music and so I’ve been recording all of my mp3s onto CD so I can take them with me. I just hope that the car’s CD player recognises mp3s. If not, I’m a bit stuck.

And so Montreal. I’ve made a list of what I need and it’s rather silly. A saucepan – knife and fork – tin opener – all that kind of stuff. That’s a Dollar Store job and if not, an IKEA and that’s why I’m landing in Montreal – there are no IKEA branches further east.

Another thing too – I saw soneone take a photo of Caliburn this afternoon. An elderly man and his wife. Does this mean I should be expecting a phone call about solar panels? It’s really a good move plastering your vehicle with advertising if you are in business. I don’t care what anyone else says.

Wednesday 8th June 2011 – HAVING LEFT DAVE’S …

alston moor nenthead cumbria ul… last night at … errr … 05:30 this morning in broad daylight, I found a suitable place to park up.

We’re on top on a mountain on the Alston Moor somewhere not too far away from Nenthead.

And when I finally awoke … errr … this afternoon, I had some fun with some locals who were admiring Caliburn’s signwriting with consternation.
“Good place for a dozen wind turbines, isn’t it?”

The speed at which they climbed into their car and shot off, presumably to launch another NIMBY campaign against wind farms, was impressive to say the least.

Say what you like about these NIMBY environmentalists. They couldn’t care less about more nuclear powers stations being built, as long as they are in someone else’s back yard.

Having had a quick coffee, I drove for ages (and it was ages too) through all of the horse-drawn caravans littering the road between Middleton and Kirkby Lonsdale.

You have no idea – or maybe you can guess – how much I hate these after having to negotiate an endless stream of them on some of the narrowest and most winding A-roads in the country.

Horses out of control “driven” by drivers who don’t have a clue. They need tests and drivers’ licences – they need road tax and a minimum speed limit.

And – even more importantly – they need to keep a substantial distance between themselves and the one o front instead of bunching up in impassable lines of 10 and 12 outfits

Failing that, they can p155 off into a field and get out of everyone’s feet. There are plenty of bridlepaths and cartways where they can mill about at their leisure out of everyone else’s way.

I finally arrived in Middlewich just about in time to rescue Percy Penguin from work and give her my fullest attention. But it was touch and go, I’ll tell you.

Now I’m on Sandbach Services and I’m sodding off in a minute to find a place to sleep. Its [gulp] 02:31 and I have a lot to do tomorrow.

Thursday 2nd June 2011 – I FOUND A …

caliburn overnight parking poplar motors lymm cheshire uk… lovely place to kip last night. A bit of old abandoned road near the Poplar Motors Cafe near Lymm on the edge of the M6.

Another one of those places that is totally deserted at night but when you wake up in the morning it’s swamped out with car-sharers.

And I had quite an early start this morning. Thanks for the text, Percy Penguin

With my early start it wasn’t long before I ended up on Trafford Park at Screwfix and Toolstation – my catalogues are out of date and need replacing.

And then round to Maccess – the auto-spars wholesalers – for some car bits (I still have my trade card for there from when I had my taxis).

Maccess has gone right downhill but I managed to spend £220 there all the same, including the new brake pads that I need for Caliburn (the guy at the MoT station said that they were down).

From there I sped along the M62 to St Helens to my storage unit. I’ve emptied that out and closed it down now.

A quick nip across the yard to Elite Workwear to order some more shirts with logos as the ones I have are getting a little shabby and I need some new stuff. It’s a reasonable quality, reasonable price and stops me worrying about what I’m going to be wearing.

Next stop was IKEA at Burtonwood but there was nothing really of interest there and so I went to the B&Q Superstore at Ashton-in-Makerfield for Caliburn’s suspended floor.

Here I really struck it lucky.

It seems that there was a salesman there from the B&Q Trade Counter working on a commission basis and short of his targets for trade customers. And the advantage of having corporate clothing and the like is that I actually look like a tradesman (which is, after all, the aim of it).

He asked for two proofs of identity which of course I don’t have, but one of the advantages of having a fully-signwritten van like Caliburn is that it looks kosher, no matter what the reality might or might not be, and that was the aim of that as well.

For the second piece of identity, which needed to be proof of a business address, did I not have in Caliburn the lease of my 1 cubic metre of mailbox in Stoke on Trent that I signed yesterday?

And so with a salesman desperately seeking a target figure and willing to turn something of a blind eye to the finer points of the paperwork, I now have a B&Q Trade Card, and you can’t knock that.

Especially as one of the reasons that I am here is to buy 5 glazed interior doors like the one into my little attic (that came from B&Q a few years ago).

I really can’t emphasise this enough – a van isn’t simply a means of transporting goods and possessions around – it’s 15 square metres of mobile advertising space and if you are in any kind of business you should make the most if it.

I reckon that over half of whatever it is that I have done has come due to the £250 I spent in having Caliburn signwritten.

And so to Crewe – and it seems that my house in Gainsborough Road needs a total rewire as the cabling is falling to bits. No surprise there – I bought the house in 1981 and the only attention that the wiring has had since then has been the couple of extra sockets that I added.

Actually, it’s probably them that need replacement – I didn’t have a clue what I was doing in those days … “and today?” – ed.

The estate agents also tell me that they had to replace the carpets on the ground floor as they were all threadbare. “Not to worry” I replied. “They were there when I bought the place in 1981” – which brought the house down.

“Well, you’ve had your money’s worth there then” said the agent.

After shopping at the new Morrison’s at Crewe, next stop was to rescue Percy Penguin, who couldn’t get home after work, and give her some personal attention.

And that was that. Here I am on Sandbach Services with a new mega-fast high-speed interent connection, and free too, thanks to Roadchef Services and BT Openlink.

I’m off to bed in a minute, if I can think of somewhere handy to sleep.

Tuesday 31st May 2011 – THE EVIL HAS LANDED!

And I’m now curled up in the back of Caliburn fast asleep in a cut-off of the A5 at Markyate.

pont de l'arche franceThis morning though, I was curled up on a car park at Pont de l’Arche on the banks of the River Eure. Quite painless here, it was.

And where those cranes are in the distance, that’s the River Seine.

The two rivers are quite close together, separated by a low earthen bank and run parallel to each other for a considerable distance.

pont de l'arche franceThe town itself is quite beautiful and has quite a history.

There’s a Roman road that passes near here and with this being one of the easiest crossings of the rivers, there was a Roman camp not too far away.

It’s considered likely therefore that the origins of the town were in the civilian settlement that would have been here to service the Roman camp.

pont de l'arche franceIn the early Medieval period sometime in the 9th Century, the presence of a bridge across the rivers here was recorded.

This bridge was guarded by two fortresses, one at either end. It took the Vikings four months to reach Paris during their invasion of 885, much of which was due to the spirited defence of the forts.

The Viking encampment is just outside the town at Damps – which was the argot, or slang for “Danish”.

l'église Notre-Dame-des-Arts fortifications pont de l'arche franceLike most towns in strategic positions, it was fortified and in places, traces of the fortifications can still be seen.

But even where the fortifications no longer exist, it’s very easy to imagine just where they might have been and how they might have looked.

And remember my pet theory about churches and fortresses? That’s exactly the kind of place where you would have had an early Medieval fortress,
isn’t it?

l'église Notre-Dame-des-Arts pont de l'arche franceThe church itself, l’église Notre-Dame-des-Arts, dates from the 16th Century and is in what is said to be the “flamboyant gothic” style. I won’t argue with that.

The stalls are quite interesting – they are said to have come from Bonport Abbey when it was dismantled after the French Revolution.

The altar is a baroque creation of the 17th Century and there is also a magnificent organ donated by Henri IV.

pont de l'arche franceThe town is actually of some significance in British history.

It was a favourite haunt of Richard the Lion-Heart, who was of course Duke of Normandy, during his battles with King Philippe II of France and fighting took place in the vicinity.

And in World War I the Royal Flying Corps had a big depot here that reconditioned and repaired aeroplane engines for the front-line squadrons.

So now I’m moving on.

Rouen was not a problem (for a change) although I wish that they would build a by-pass around the town and I arrived in Boulogne for a late-ish lunch. The big LeClerc on the edge of town came up with some goodies, and then I went for a stroll around the town.

I wasn’t stopping though, I had other fish to fry.

batterie todt battery audinghen pas de calais franceOn the coast between the two villages of Audresselles and Audinghem are what are known as the Batteries Todt – the “Todt Batteries”.

Fritz Todt was the German Minister for Armaments and Munitions in the early days of World War II prior to his death in 1942.

One of his tasks was the overseeing of the forced labour gangs, and another was the construction of the border fortifications.

batterie todt battery audinghen pas de calais franceHis “Todt Organisation” undertook construction of the Atlantic Wall – the system of fortifications that protected the French and Belgian coasts from invasion.

Part of the fortifications consisted of four massive concrete bunkers, each one of which contained a huge 380mm gun, the kind of which was fitted to some of the biggest battleships.

batterie todt battery audinghen pas de calais franceThese could fire shells well over 30 miles on a good day and so the Kent coast was well within range.

This would make them a natural target of RAF Bomber Command and so these gun emplacements were build with roofs and walls of reinforced concrete 3.5 metres thick, and were protected by 9 75mm anti-aircraft guns.

batterie todt battery audinghen pas de calais franceConstruction began in August 1940 and the first shell was fired on 20th January 1942, although the official opening was on 10th February.

There was a field of fire of 120° and so they had a pretty good control of the Channel and the Kent coast.

Nothing could move over there without the Germans seeing it and being able to fire at it.

batterie todt battery audinghen pas de calais franceEach gun required a crew of four officers and eighteen men, and with all of the tasks that had to be performed, a force of 600 men was involved.

It wasn’t until the 29th of September that the guns were finally silent, captured by the North Nova Scotia Highlanders from the 3rd Canadian Army during “Operation Undergo”

batterie todt battery audinghen pas de calais franceTheir attack was preceded on the 26th of September by 532 bombers which dropped a total of 855 tonnes of bombs. And you can see the damage that they caused here.

Although there is no record of any “Grand Slam” 5-tonne penetration bomb being dropped in this raid, they were being employed elsewhere in the vicinity against German “special artillery” and I can’t imagine anything else that would do this much damage.

english channel kent coast cap griz nez pas de calais franceIt was a beautiful late afternoon/early evening and so I wandered off to my little haunt on the top of Cap Griz Nez.

There’s a nice, quiet little car park where I have spent many a happy hour (and several comfortable nights).

And there’s also a stunning view from here right across the English Channel.

english channel kent coast cap griz nez pas de calais franceWith a really good telephoto lens you can see most things when there is nothing to obstruct your vision, like trees and the like.

Over there to the left of the ship you might be able to make out the Richborough Power Station between Sandwich and Ramsgate.

You’ll probably have to click on this photo to see a larger image in order to see it more clearly.

cap griz nez pas de calais franceSitting here with my binoculars ship-spotting, at one time I could count as many as 42 ships in sight.

Not for nothing is the English Channel described as being the busiest sea lane in the world.

It’s so busy that in fact that ships have to “drive on the right” when they are sailing through the Channel, just as they do when they enter the harbour at Halifax.

cap giz nez pas de calais franceMy train isn’t quite late and so I could sit here and cook myself a meal in the back of Caliburn. I did remember my gas stove for once.

Having eaten and washed up, I went back up to the scenic viewpoint to watch the sun set on the British Empire. I reckoned that that was rather symbolic.

At the appropriate time I drove up the coast to the Channel Tunnel terminal and we whizzed through on the train to Folkestone.

But we had some excitement at the Tunnel terminal.

A French Customs official came out of his hut, looking all official and the like, and flagged me down. I thought that this was going to be a search or some other interaction of some unpleasant sort, but far from it.

Caliburn, being fully-signwritten as you know, attracts a considerable amount of attention when he’s on his travels and this Customs Official had seen the signs.

He wanted to talk wind turbines and seeing as I was running a little early, we had a lengthy chat. The result is that he took a card and he’ll be in touch.

Even though I was starting to feel tired, I make it a rule never to stop until I’m around the M25 an heading north. Having to negotiate the M25 in daylight hours is a pointless exercise – I’ll be stuck there for a week.

03:00 is definitely the time to be round there, and by 04:00 (yet again) I was pulling into a little truncated road that I know where the A5 has been diverted.

Not the first time I’ve stayed here. We parked here the night in 1973 – a dozen of us in a hired Bedford CF van after watching the Speedway World Finals at Wembley.

Saturday 23rd April 2011 – I haven’t done much more today either…

tacot ligne economique gare durdat larequille puy de dome france… although I have made an important discovery. Acting on information received (from Henri at Radio Tartasse as it happens) I managed to track down the railway station for the ligne economique, otherwise known as the tacot, at Durdat – Larequille about eight or so miles from where I live.

And here it is, with grateful thanks to the owner who gave me permission to photograph it.

For those of you who haven’t been following my blog for all that long, you probably won’t know that back at the turn of the 20th Century the Département of the Allier was honeycombed with railway tracks belong to the Lignes Economiques, a system of metre-gauge railways that ran all over the place.

I say that they “ran all over the place” and that isn’t an exaggeration because they very rarely ran anywhere near the villages that they were supposed to serve and the one here at Durdat is well over a mile from the village. In fact one early commentator described the railway stations as “seeming to have the purpose of just adding decoration to the countryside“. The engines wheezed and coughed and spluttered around the countryside, gaining the nickname Tacot, which is French for an “old banger” or “rattletrap” and by 1950 or so they had been all swept away by road transport.

tacot ligne economique gare durdat larequille puy de dome franceYou can see, if you look carefully, the outline of the railway trackbed just in front of the station building.

The line, which ran from the lime kilns at Marcillat to the steel mill at Commentry, was the first to go – being abandoned in 1932 when the standard gauge line from Montlucon to Gouttieres arrived at Marcillat.

And, ironically, the main line was closed in 1939 due to wartime circumstances and never reopened for passengers, meaning that Marcillat was isolated as far as passengers were concerned long before the rest of the ligne economique system was abandoned.

I’ve found most of the stations and some traces of the line but the station at Durdat-Larequille was always elusive, until Henri told me where it was.


All of this came about because I was in Montlucon shopping today. I’ve stocked up with food and all kinds of things, as well as almost everything to finish the water butts (Brico Depot is hopeless) including the nylon stockings for making my sand filters. Why ever didn’t I think of Noz before?

A swim at Neris on the way back, fit the new tap onto the water butts, and that was me, done. But there I am saying tat Brico Depot is hopeless – here they are after all this time of me harassing them and here they are now stocking BULKHEAD FITTINGS – the hollow threaded tube that you pass through the sides of water tanks. I’ve been nagging them about these for ages and now they finally carry them. This will make my life so much easier.

But in Montlucon I had two interesting encounters. A guy at LIDL stopped me and asked me “is that your van outside?” and so we had a long chat about wind turbines and solar panels and he’s coming to see me next week.

There has been a lot of discussion just recently about advertising and people have different opinions about different things, but for me, having corporate colours and a corporate logo, and having clothes that match the van for the colours and the logo – that seems to work for me.

And then on the Brico Depot car park, Julie and Rob came over for a chat and to tell me that they want me to go over and chat to a friend about solar panels. Having a vehicle that is a distinctive shape, a distinctive size and a distinctive colour – that seems to work too.

People can see me coming a long way off, and at the very least it gives them plenty of time to hide.