… put my sooty foot inside my apartment downstairs. I rang up the letting agents to ask them about the keys, and was told that they had them there as they weren’t sure what to do with them. As my faithful cleaner was in town, I sent her a message and a couple of hours later, she duly presented herself at my door with the aforementioned.

And I do have to say that the tenant has not been very kind to the place. I shall have to find a decorator now to give the place a coat of paint before I move in, at the very least.

But anyway, as I have said before … "and on many occasions too" – ed … it’s a total waste of time going to bed early, because all it means is that I awaken correspondingly early the following morning.

Being dog-tired and dead to the World last night, I dashed through what I needed to do and then crawled into bed at about 22:30, where I fell asleep even before my head touched the pillow.

And while I expected to be awake early, because that’s how things are when I try to have a lie-in, 03:20 is really rather ridiculous. No matter how I tried, I couldn’t go back to sleep and at 04:00 I was sitting at the computer working.

First task was to deal with the radio notes that I’d dictated a couple of days ago in another early start. They are now all edited, the programme has been assembled and it’s all ready to go – in about a year’s time. I’m that far ahead these days.

Next was to listen to the dictaphone to find out if I’d been anywhere during the night. And I was surprised to find that I had, despite how short the night had been. I had been working on a figure in 3D last night. The bottom part went really well but I was disappointed with the upper half. I tried working it with another basic figure and managed to make the top half fine but the bottom I didn’t like. In the end what I did was that I saved the bottom half of the first figure and the top half of the second figure and then merged them both together. It seemed to work very well. Then I thought that I’d better work on some texturing for it to make sure that it’s at least finished in some fashion. That was what I was doing when I awoke.

Except, of course, that I didn’t awaken. And, as regular readers of this rubbish will recall, I just don’t have the time these days to do as much with 3D that I did back in the farm where I seemed to have an enormous amount of free time in the evenings after I’d finished work. In fact, I don’t have the time to do very much of anything. Where does the time go?

And later on, I was working on the biography of the group “Soft Machine” of Robert Wyatt. I was having the same kind of difficulty there. I could make half of the biography go very well and the other half not. When I went to do it again I managed to do the reverse so I thought once more about splitting them into two and combining the two best halves. That was where I reached when I awoke.

This seems to be becoming an issue, this “doing things by halves”. As for Soft Machine’s biography, they haven’t featured in any of my programmes for over a year so I’m hardly likely to be working on their biography. I think that the radio stuff is getting to me too! And I didn’t awaken then either.

After I’d had a wash, a good scrub up and taken my medicine, I found plenty of other things to do until Isabelle the Nurse arrived. She didn’t have much to say for herself this morning. She was in something of a rush, I reckon, and was soon off on her travels.

Once she’d gone, I made breakfast and read some more of my book MY BOOK.

It seems that our author is as much in a rush to reach the final pages as I am. We’re dashing through castles at an incredible rate, including a whistle-stop tour of that well-known English castle, Urquhart Castle, situated in that very traditional “heart-of-England” county called … errr … Inverness shire.

We didn’t stay there long though. We’re now in Wareham Castle in Dorset, where I encountered this magnificent sentence –
"Wareham Corfe are the keys of Purbeck, or rather Corfe is the fortress and Wareham the bridge-head of that bold projection of the chalk of Dorset, the southern headland of which bears the name of the protomartyr of England, and of which the triple spurs of Durlston, Peverell, and Studland form the eastern points, each with its own bay, and the whole protecting from the prevalent west wind the great indentation of the coast between Purbeck and the Needles, in the bight of which opens the harbour of Poole, and, under Hengistbury Head, the mouth of the twin streams that once gave name to Christchurch, before either castle or priory rose upon the banks of the Avon."
That is probably the most flamboyant sentence that I have ever read

Back in here, I had to telephone the agents to ask about the keys, and then I sat down to plan the next radio programme, which will be broadcast on … errr … 19th June 2026, assuming that the World has not come to an end before then. Whoever would have thought that, in the 21st Century, we would be thinking like that?

However, retournons à nos moutons as they say around here, I didn’t have half of the music that I needed so I spent a lot of time hunting it all down. But by the time that my cleaner arrived, I’d chosen all of the music, obtained it all, remixed and edited it, paired it off and segued the pairs all ready to write the notes.

Armed with the keys, a tape measure, a notebook and a camera-phone, we went downstairs for a look around and to measure up.

The place doesn’t look as nice as it did in the photos from when it was sold in 2016. The walls have had some patching up done to them and where they have been painted, the paint colour doesn’t match. The interior of the fitted wardrobe needs painting too. I’s been done with cheap emulsion and looks quite awful.

There’s an awful smell coming out of the dishwasher drain and that’s going to have to be cleaned out and sealed off because I don’t use a dishwasher and there’s no other way of preventing the smell from rising.

All in all, it’s not as nice as it was made out to be, but seeing as it was only 67% of the price of the two others that are on sale right now in the building (and one of those is in a poor state) I’m not complaining at all.

When it’s finished, it will be something really exceptional, I hope, provided that I can afford to have it done. The days when I could do things like this (and would do too at the drop of a hat) are long-gone.

We came back upstairs and I went through all of the photos, sorted them, annotated them and send one batch off to the electrician for his attention, showing exactly what I want doing.

Afterwards, I began to go through them again to annotate them for the joiner who is doing the kitchen, but then I reckoned that I need to be finalising the plans for the kitchen. That’s not a job of five minutes, especially as IKEA’s opening statement on their kitchen planner is “which oven would you like?” and there’s no “none” option.

As usual I became quite bogged down in whatever I was doing and made very little headway before it was time to knock off for tea, having a little chat with my architect friend along the way..

A leftover curry again, with more curry left over because I wasn’t all that hungry, which was just as well, seeing that I’d forgotten to take some naan dough out of the freezer.

On that note I’m going to go to bed ready for dialysis tomorrow, I don’t think.

But seeing as we have been talking about our author and his long-winded way of expressing himself … "well, one of us has" – ed … I always remember two guys discussing various words in the English language.
One of them said "do you know what? I reckon that the word ‘marriage’ must be one of the longest words in the English language."
"Of course it isn’t." retorted his friend
"And why isn’t it?"
"Because it’s not even a word."
"What is it then?"
"Everyone knows the answer to that. ‘Marriage’ isn’t a word, it’s a sentence."