Tag Archives: football

Saturday 20th November 2010 – I WENT SHOPPING TODAY …

… for the first time since I’ve been back. Ist port of call was the cheapo car spares place in St Eloy. Despite his shop, he knows nothing about whatever it is that he’s selling and couldn’t understand amp-hours for batteries and the like. He ended up measuring the battery tray in Caliburn and trying to sell me a generic 95-amp-hour battery that would fit – for €109:50.

But of course anyone who remembers the discussion we had about tyres when we were building the trailer will recall this kind of performance, and from the same guy too. The big tyre and exhaust place in Montlucon will sell me the correct battery (a 92-amp-hour battery as it happens) by one of the leading makes of battery manufacturer, and for just €10 more and so I reckon that that is the route I’ll be taking.

Monday I’ll need to book Caliburn in for his service and order the battery so that it arrives at more-or-less the same time. I might even treat myself to a night in Montlucon while the work is being done.

Round the shops, Carrefour is getting worse and worse but LIDL is still the same. They were having a music sale this week and so I bought a guitar stand for the agnostic guitar. I’m still humming and hahing over an electric 6-string and I’m still regretting not buying that Hohner 6-string that I saw in that junk shop in Boulogne two years ago.

This afternoon we had the Annual General Meeting of Pionsat Patrimoine – the local history group. And for a change, for a body of intense and passionate people, the meeting moved along quite smartly.

I seem to have managed to have had myself elected to the organising committee (heaven help them) and we’ll have to wait and see what tasks we are offered once it’s properly up and running.

After that we went for coffee and a chat and much to my surprise I was there for a good two hours. Not like me at all, this. Normally I’m the first to bolt for home.

No footy either – it’s a bye week during which clubs might catch up with outstanding fixtures. But the season has run pretty smoothly so far, said Jean-Pierre who plays for the 3rd XI and who had his pizza van parked up on the square at Pionsat.

But at about 15:00 the heavens opened and it’s been pouring down all night. I hate this weather.

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Sunday 26th September 2010 – I’m exhausted …

… and that’s just from watching the football this afternoon. If I had been playing in it I would have been absolutely worn out long before half-time.

We were out at a wind-swept Herment today for the 2nd XI’s match, and I can safely say without fear of contradiction that I have never seen FC Pionsat St Hilaire’s defence play as badly as they played today.

Slow off the mark for the ball, not quick enough going back, failing to clear the ball when they had possession – you name it, the Pionsat defence did (or didn’t) do it.

And it was only a heroic performance by Matthieu in goal – easily the best I have ever seen him play – performing acrobatic like this that kept the score down to a 3-2 defeat.

But today got off to something of a bad start. I was up early for a change and just as well for at 10:04 precisely Bill came round. He needed some help setting up an e-mail account so I sorted him out. But at 10:04 on a Sunday??

And so after that I worked on my notes for the radio programme and spoke to Desiree the local estate agent who gave me some useful info for a radio programme that I have in mind for the future.

On the way back from the football I went round to Terry and Liz’s to talk radio. Simon was there and so we had a chat about a project I have in mind.

I also found the time this morning to book my train out. I’m on the 17:39 from Riom to Paris as I’ve decided to hang around there through the night. There may well be a left-luggage at the Gare du Nord and I might even find a cheap hotel nearby. And if not I can always go for a wander around the city through the night. There will be plenty to do there rather than sitting curled up on a draughty railway station in the middle of nowhere.

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Saturday 25th September 2010 – Well, I’m back home.

And hasn’t this been an exciting few days?

The journey back was just as exciting though – it was raining when I left Brussels, (which was actually at about 21:00 in the evening Friday) and it gradually came down heavier and heavier.

At Troyes it was starting to become difficult to see with the rain and my eyelids were becoming heavier and heavier, so I parked up at St Florentin at 01:30 for a few hours for a sleep.

A torrential downpour woke me up at about 08:00 and that set the seal on the whole day. It rained non-stop after that and I brought the whole lot back home with me.

But the exciting events of the last couple of days have worn me out and I crashed out this afternoon. In fact I was hard-pushed to make it to the footy tonight.

And don’t ask me what happened there because I really can’t remember. I came back here and was out like a light.

I’ll be dead for a week, I reckon.

Sunday 19th September 2010 – What do you make of this?

I went to Giat for the footy this afternoon and as I was a little early I went for a wander around the town.

Of course it wasn’t long before I found myself at the railway station – on the line between Montlucon and Eygurande (the junction with the line from Clermont-Ferrand to Bordeaux). Even though the line is still listed as being open, no trains run and the service is assured by an express bus, but I was here to look at the station.

And if as by pure chance I noticed this railway sleeper just here. – the second (and also the third) up from the bottom. The rails are firmly attached to the sleepers of course, and set at “standard gauge” – which is 4’8½”.

But if you look closely you can see other bolt holes and impressions in the wood where other chairs have sat on the sleepers at one time. And although I didn’t have a measure with me, a quick and rough estimation put the centre of these chairs, where the rails might be, at about 1 metre apart.

1 metre rings a bell of course – it’s our old friend the Ligne Economique up in the Allier and on a couple of occasions the Ligne Economique shared a set of sleepers and a common track bed with the standard gauge lines, especially in bay platforms at shared railway stations. And when the Ligne Economique closed down, the lines in these bay platforms were for the most part ripped up. So this has got me wondering if the sleepers from the ripped-up bay platforms were put into store for reuse.

The football at Giat was a real “game of two halves”. In the first period Pionsat swarmed all over the opposition. They scored 2 and they could have had 20 without too much effort.

But at half-time they went to sleep and in the second half Condat-Giat-Voingt went on the attack. They pulled one back and weren’t all that far from getting a second. The transformation was remarkable.

After the game I had to go to Terry’s to bleed the fuel system on the tractor. The quickest route between Giat and Terry’s passes through Pontaumur where I refereed last weekend so I had to stop and put on some dark glasses and a false beard.

We were ages trying to bleed the fuel system and it wasn’t working at all. There was clearly something I missed so I asked Terry to look on the internet under “bleeding diesel”. He replied that we may as well look under “f*cking petrol” and we would still have the same result. But we eventually solved it. The diesel was filthy and it seemed that when the tank ran dry the level of dust and scum floating on the top had settled down and blocked the top of the tap inside the tank. Draining the diesel (mostly all over me) and dismantling the tap and we could clean everything out. Once we’d cleaned it and bled it (and it worked this time) we got it running. And I was paid in food – something that is always welcome.

But on the way to Liz and Terry’s Strawberry Moose and I saw a deer. As it was a female, His Nibs wanted to chase it but I had to tell him … “if you are anything round here you are a stag – S-T-A-G – the second letter is not an H.

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Saturday 11th September 2010 – AND SO AFTER BREAKFAST …

… I went to part II of this meeting. It was still just as interesting – except that they didn’t get me a meal. Apparently my special diet is too much effort for them. Well, never mind. They will be hearing more about this because I was quite fed up, especially as the Sports Centre across the road closed just as I was about to investigate if it had any food.

And this afternoon, we went off to a Sports Stadium on the south side of the city to watch a referee and to criticise his refereeing. He made a few deliberate mistakes to see if we would spot them, and we also spotted a few unintentional errors too.

Once the match was over we had our debriefing and then it was back to Head Office. I didn’t know the way so the guy in charge shouted “follow me” – and then piddled off before Caliburn and I were ready.

Nevertheless we worked out our way through Clermont Ferrand all on our own and came back all the way to Pionsat like the wind as I had promised to photograph the entire Pionsat football club for the new calendar, and I was running for time.

For the football itself, Pionsat’s 2nd XI lost 2-1 to hated local rivals St Gervais d’Auvergne while the 1st XI spannered Menat 4-0. A couple of exciting matches, even though they were a little bad-tempered.

Franck has forgotten my shorts and so I had to scrounge a pair for making my debut with the whistle tomorrow. Such is life. But the good news is that the club has made me a little “gesture” towards my expenses of travelling back and to to Clermont Ferrand. That was nice of them and it is much appreciated, as I’m a bit down on my uppers right now.

And so tomorrow I make my debut in centre-field.

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Sunday 5th September 2010 – One thing that I promised never to do …

… was to criticise anyone else’s attempts at foreign language translations. And for two reasons –

people ought to be congratulated for making any attempt at doing their best to make themselves understood/li>
of course, the stuff that I do is nothing to write home about and I wouldn’t like mine to receive the same kind of criticism

But be that as it may, my imagination isn’t half working overtime about the condition third from bottom on the list on the right, and all kind of images are floating through my mind.

I had a lovely afternoon out this afternoon though, although this morning was something of a disaster. It was about 04:00 when I went to bed, I was dealing with a computer issue for all of Saturday until then – and yet at 09:00 I was up and about and breakfasted. And on a Sunday too.!

“How did you manage that?” I hear you say.
That was thanks to whoever it was who rang me at 08:10 and said “C’est toi, Albert?” And when I told him that he had a wrong number, rang me back twice more until I finally convinced him.

And so with my Sunday ruined, I did some more website stuff for the rest of the morning.

After lunch I set out for the football at Blot-l’Eglise, a nice village up in the hills at the back of Manzat and Combronde.

FC Pionsat St Hilaire’s 1st XI won 1-0 in a good, enjoyable match played in a very friendly atmosphere in beautiful weather conditions, but in all honesty Blot l’Eglise could still be out there now, all on their own attacking an empty net, and they still wouldn’t have equalised.

On the way back I parked up for a while at the Moulin de Braynant (where I saw the above notice) and went for a walk along the Gorge de la Sioule, such a beautiful afternoon that it was. The weather was gorgeous, the scenery was impressive and it really was a pleasure to be out and about.

This is quite a touristy spot here and a very popular place for watersports, as Lee Potty-mouth and Rick Hollyoaks will tell you.

They also hire out kayaks (and this is what the notice above refers to, by the way) and one day I’m going to have a go at this. It’s a long time since I’ve been in a boat – I used to canoe for my school back in the late 1960s, which is just as well as there are no lessons on offer here.

I asked them how beginners manage, and the response was that they have to paddle their own canoe around here.

They need to make sure that they take all the correct equipment with them otherwise that they can find themselves right up the creek without a paddle.

The notice above, by the way, omits two of the most important rules of kayaking, and maybe I ought to repeat them here.

you are not allowed to light a fire in a canoe. After all, you cannot have your kayak and heat it
it is forbidden to make love in a canoe. After all, making love in a canoe is just the same as English beer – it’s f*cking close to water

And after all of that, I came back here and crashed out for … errrr …. four hours – now I can’t sleep.

In other news, something has happened this evening that I have been waiting 10 months to do. And just like a hurricane, you know that it is inevitably going to happen and you are totally powerless – there is nothing that you can do that will stop it.

Yes, I have finally, at long last, managed to spill a full mug of coffee all over the floor in my nice attic room 🙁

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Saturday 4th September 2010 – We are back where we left off in May.

But never mind the footy for the moment – just look at the picture.

It’s not just streets ahead of what the old Pentax K100D could do – it’s on a totally different planet. ISO 3200 setting on RAW data with a shutter speed of 400 and automatic exposure and then the image reduced from 4200×3000 to 800×533 and it can churn out stuff like this.

This is definitely the way forward and as I said the other day, a decent (read “expensive”) lens makes a whole new world of difference. I’ll settle for this quality.

Remember that the floodlights are only cheap basic stuff, probably not even 250LUX. A proper professional football ground has a light output of 750LUX and that would give almost daylight-quality.

As for the match itself, this is Pionsat’s 3rd XI playing St Angel, and they started off the season with a 2-1 win. There were a couple of new lads playing for the side and they looked the business.

But before anyone gets too excited, the 2nd XI don’t have a game this weekend. Next weekend when all three teams are out you’ll see a different 3rd XI on the field and we’ll be back to the motley. But get the points in while you can.

At the moment the 3rd XI are top of the league, and that really is a moment to savour.

Today I’ve been working – in the morning on my Virlet website and later pointing the eastern wall. Three buckets of mortar went into it today. And I now know which are the animals that live in the holes in that wall. I threw a paintbrush full of water into one of the holes to flush out some loose sand and I flushed out a rather indignant bat. I’m not sure who was more surprised, me or him, but I threw another brush-load of water at him, he took the hint and piddled off, and I quickly filled in the hole before he came back.

But this pointing is ever so slow – it’s going to take me for ever.

Does anyone remember those green fruits on the tree in my garden – I posted an image of them a few months back. They are in fact damsons and so seeing as I didn’t have any strawberries to eat with my plain soya dessert this evening, I grabbed a handful and boiled them in some sugar and water and made a kind of syrup. I added some of that to the soya and it tasted really good. I like this idea of profiting as much as possible from what is available to eat here.

And in other news, talking football again, I see that next Sunday afternoon the referee for the 2nd Division match between Pontaumur and Chapdes Beaufort is a Mr E Hall of Pionsat.

God help them!

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Sunday 25th July 2010 – Coming back …

… from Liz and Terry’s this evening, I was just crossing over the Font Nanaud as the sun was setting. I stopped and took a few photos, as is my wont, and while most of them turned out quite well, this one is in fact quite spectacular.

I had to take it on a very fast shutter so as to avoid any blur or interference and the colours have come out perfectly, which is quite a surprise. I’m impressed with this.

I’d been round there this evening to organise our radio programme for the next few weeks. We will be talking about this auto-entrepreneur system but seeing as we only have enough information for three weeks we will also be doing something about playing football in the region. I reckon that there are loads of expats living in the area dying to integrate and not sure how – and football is a universal language.

So that’s what I was doing this morning and in the early part of the afternoon – preparation. later on I went to the brocante at Youx – quite a big one too as it happens. I bought something that indicated on it that it was 12-volt current in and 230 volt current out at 80 watts – ideal for Caliburn. But it wasn’t half a Stone-Age appliance. We started off at €10 but I got it knocked down to €3 in the end.

At Terry’s we had a play with it. We put 12 volts into it – and got nothing out. And Terry doubts that it is what it says that it is on the label. It’s not like any inverter he has ever seen.

So I dunno. I’ll add it to the stuff to be played with at a later date.

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Monday 21st June 2010 – Sometimes when you do house clearances …

… you strike it lucky – although it’s not all that often. Most of the stuff that Kate had to dispose of had already been disposed but she did keep a couple of things back for me, including this magnificent “foot forward” tandem, for which I’m extremely grateful.

It’s a home-made effort made up of bits of bike cobbled together and although the idea and the design look sound enough, the workmanship is somewhat rudimentary and it needs finishing.

But what is extraordinary about it is that I’ve been looking for a bakfiets for years and having a good look at this, I can see that parts of it actually started out as a bakfiets and so it will be a comparatively easy task to convert it back.

I could be on to something here.

But the move was exciting in more ways than one. Due to Guillaume’s van having broken down I was asked if I could deliver Rebecca’s stuff to her. But a constant change of plan meant that the boxes and so on for her were in and out of the van on numerous occasions before Karl and Lou ended up taking them. For most people this constant change of plan wasn’t an issue but for one person, who wasn’t even involved in the move and who spent most of his time standing around and watching, it was a total crisis. If it had been anyone that I had known, he would have had a smack in the mouth long before we had finished. I dunno how people put up with behaviour like this.

So I took my leave of Kate, which was disappointing because I quite like her and I wish that I had got to know her better, and I went off with Karl and Lou to look at their house. It’s a nice little place in Lapeyrouse. we’re having a chantier there on Saturday to help progress the work

. At the moment they are living in a caravan with a huge awning and I can safely say that it is the first time ever that I have seen a caravan awning with a fitted kitchen. Definitely a step up from the days of the camp camp.

This afternoon after unloading Caliburn I did some gardening. I’ve planted out a few more plants and I’ve done some more succession sowing.

Those of you who have been following my adventures will know that all of the water consumed on the premises is from the rain that falls on the verandah. It drops down a pipe into a sump that catches the stones and heavy rubbish and then backs up into a pipe that goes through a mesh filter into a 203-litre water butt with a tap for water out. The tap is situated about 10cms off the bottom to allow anything that falls into the tank (sticks, stones, leaves etc) to sink to the bottom.

There’s another 203-litre water butt that is connected to it. Of course all water destined for human consumption is boiled beforehand.

But an examination of the water butts the other day showed that the water in the “in and out” water butt is not as clean as I would like it to be whereas the tank in parallel is spotlessly clean because nothing ever drops into it – it’s all fed in by the connector pipe which is at 10cms off the bottom of the other tank.

That situation can be altered by feeding into the rearmost tank and drawing the water out of the front tank and it’s a modification that I’ve had in mind for a while.

But at Brico Depot on Saturday they had the bits I needed and so I cleaned the mesh filter, cleaned out the pipework, swapped the lids over and routed the rainwater pipe into the rear tank.

The bits that drop into the water will stay on the floor of the rear tank and the front tank should stay quite clean.

But there are two other mods that I can do. I’m going to build an in-line filter and fill it with puzzolane, the volcanic lava rock that has impressive water-filtering capabilities, and seal the two tanks so that nothing can creep in underneath the lids.

And this morning I went to the medical centre at St Eloy les Mines for my medical for this refereeing lark. I passed pretty much although I have to go to Montlucon for a test d’effort and an ECG. But the doctor told me that he thinks that my blood pressure is up.
“Well, so would yours be if this weather has done to your garlic what it’s been doing to mine”. But having to have a tetanus injection is exciting. I was given a prescription to go to the chemist’s to buy the injection, and then I have to go back to see the nurse to get her to give it to me.

Tomorrow Terry has another engagement so I’m going to do Bill’s starter for him.

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Saturday 29th May 2010 – Errrr….

… quite!

Returning home this evening after the chantier I had a tremendous surprise

Those of you with long memories will recall that back in the winter 2008-9 I cleared a plot of land of old trees, weeds, brmables and the like ready to make a parking place for Caliburn and the trailer etc etc. But there were all kinds of rubbish stones and the like to move. And endless searches for diggers was fruitless. Eventually Bernard from the footy club told me of one and we made contact but since the guy’s visit here last week I’ve been waiting for him to get back to me.

Anyway, when I returned home I found that he had been and gone, having dug out absolutely everything and a few more things besides.

It’s not exactly how I wanted it but habitual readers of this blog will have noticed that I have a tendency to vacillate. So, recognising my own failings more than anything else, I’m glad that he came to do it while I wasn’t here because it avoided me getting myself all confused and mixed up and he could get on with the job without me bothering him.

Better still, he’s left the digger here and he’s told me to go ahead and get the stones delivered as soon as possible – and then he’ll come back and do the laying. He’s also brought the football club’s heavy roller for compacting the stones and that has saved a whole pile of work.

So this time next week at the latest I’ll have a proper hardstanding to park some of my vehicles and I’m so impressed. I shudder to think of the cost of it all but it’s one of those things that I need to do, and the sooner the better if you ask me.

This is the most exciting thing that has happened to me since I’ve been here.

At the chantier there weren’t so many of us as in the past. It seems that the numbers of participants are falling off. But of course it isn’t quantity that counts, it’s quality and those who were here know each other very well and are quite good friends so that all helps considerably.

Some of the participants were involved in gardening and others such as Nan, Francois and myself, carried on with making this wooden toilet and shower block that we started last year. we had quite a production line going with Francois measuring and cutting and Nan and I fixing and nailing.

We had the work done in no time, including a pause for lunch and chat.

Towards the end of the afternoon we covered up the garden that the others had dug over. A length of breathable bio-membrane covered in woodchips Jean and I fetched the chips with the car and trailer and shovelled them onto the membrane and the others spread them out And just as we finished we had a downpour

It’s nice to work in the company of convivial and pleasant people, and it appears that I might have visitors on Wednesday afternoon

In other news, Dennis Hopper has died. This is desperate news for me and for many of my friends as he and Peter Fonda were our role models as teenagers and they inspired a whole generation of people such as ourselves. I’m going to watch Easy Rider again just now but it won’t ever be the same again.

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Sunday 16th May 2010 – Football isn’t everyone’s cup of tea …

… and as we were all staggering off towards the pie hut at half-time today during the match at St Maurice pres Pionsat I couldn’t resist taking this pic of a Biollet St Maurice supporter overcome by emotion due to the hectic pace of the game.

But the young lady fast asleep by the touchline and the blue sky will give you some idea of the weather today. Summer seems to be back – and about time too.

Mind you, I can’t blame the girl for falling asleep because it was one of THOSE games this afternoon. The heat was clearly getting to everyone and so it was played at something of a leisurely pace and in the end, finished as a 0-0 draw.

Pionsat were the better side though and did have one or two chances to take the lead during the match, but I do have to admit I’ve seen many more exciting games than this one. At least, is was a pleasant day out.

I woke up at 09:57 to the sun streaming in through my windows here. It looked beautiful and I couldn’t resist thinking to myself that it was so nice that someone was bound to spoil it. And right on cue the phone rang. Bernard, the football club chairman, wanted to tell me that his son (he who has the digger) wanted to talk to me and could he come round.

So I hauled myself out of bed to wait for him. I asked Bernard a while back if he knew of someone with a digger who can dig out where I want to park Caliburn and he recommended his son. But he was stuck on a chantier in all of this bad weather. It now seems that they’ve been able to work and it may well be that by Friday they’ll be finished. So he came to see the job and reckons he’ll ring me on Friday or Saturday to tell me when he can start.

I told him about Simon’s job and he’s keen to do that too. And by the purest coincidence it seems that where Simon is living is the old workshop of Bernard’s uncle and Bernard was born in the house just next to Simon’s.

This world is getting far too small for me.

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Friday 14th May 2010 – Tomorrow, if I remember,

I’ll post a photo of a whole pile of wooden windows. They are about 6 feet tall and about 18 inches wide – something like that, and there’s probably a dozen of them. They were in Simon’s house when he bought them and he ripped them out for double glazing and asked if anyone would like to take them away.

As you know, in my drive for self-sufficiency I’m growing my own food (assuming that this perishing weather relents and we have some decent late-spring weather) and a greenhouse is an essential. I have the cheap little LIDL plastic one and someone gave me a complete aluminium greenhouse but minus all the glass. However a big pile of wooden windows fitted into a frame like an American balloon house (and how I built my verandah) and stood on breeze blocks and that’s an admirable greenhouse, especially as I can make it to measure.

And see – I did remember the photo!

My day of rest following yesterday’s exertions was broken in the afternoon as Terry decided to try his hand at driving his van. We went round to the Lady from Luxembourg who is looking for a handyman and I introduced them to each other. She was impressed with the size of Terry’s equipment and has signed him on, which is good news for Terry. He’s registered himself with the French authorities as a handyman and so now he needs some clients.

Once that was out of the way we went to Mazan to see Simon. He’s looking for a digger to dig the hole for his septic tank and I know a man (Bernard, the President of the Pionsat football club) who just happens to have one. Simon was out though, but his windows were in and he did say that I could have them, and there were two of us with Terry’s big van (which was empty). And so the rest is history.

Shopping at St Eloy les Mines was boring – there was nothing of note – and that was my day today.

Tomorrow the removal has been put back until 10:00. It seems that I’m not the only one who doesn’t recognise the existence of 09:00 on a weekend morning.

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Thursday 13th May 2010 – "And what kind of time do you call this?" …. ed

Yes, didn’t I say something about an early night? The weather was grey, depressing and miserable and so I wasn’t expecting much but 39 teams turned out for this football tournament. And so it went on until just now – in fact it was 01:20 when I returned home.

And I’m absolutely worn out too because I ended up refereeing the major part of the matches. I have to earn my corn now! I made a few mistakes but I suppose it’s a good sign when you realise it.

Another thing as well – at 15:00 when it all started I was leaping over the barrier onto the pitch. By the time the final came around at 00:50 I was crawling under it on all fours.

Tomorrow is Friday and I ought to be working but I’m tired and exhausted so I’m going for a “Saturday” day tomorrow – a gentle lie-in and then a shopping afternoon. And quite right too seeing as Saturday I should be working on this furniture removal thingy so I need to build up my strength.

Wednesday 12th May 2010 – You can see …

… what I’ve been up to today in the bedroom, even if the photo is rather blurred. I’ve fitted the two uprights (although you can only see one) for the front of the wardrobe and I’ve started to line the walls within the wardrobe with polystyrene insulation.

In fact a good day on this will probably see the wall finished, boarding included.

It won’t be tomorrow though. It’s yet another bank holiday (Ascension in fact) and there’s a footy tournament at Pionsat. And now that I have the appropriate qualifications, I’ve been asked to referee it. But it won’t be for long if the weather is anything like today. We’ve had another totally miserable grey wet depressing day again. Never mind November, it’s actually like a winter January day here. Even the cold is a wintry kind of cold.

In the garden though I noticed that a new potato plant is starting to appear so something is moving. And my onions and garlic are loving this weather – they have fine glorious bushy green leaves the sort that I’ve never seen on anything I’ve grown before.

And in other news, my SIREN number came today. I’m now a registered French tradesman and I can go out and look for work – which reminds me of an international conference that took place back in the early 1980s between Jimmy Carter, President Gorbachev and Queen Elizabeth II
Jimmy Carter ….”we transplanted a cows heart to a man and within three months he was looking for work”
President Gorbachev ….”That’s nothing. We transplanted a cow’s leg to a man and within three months he was looking for work”
Queen Elizabeth II …”That’s nothing. We transplanted a complete cow to 10 Downing Street and within three months there were three million men looking for work”.

But talking of looking for work, I’ve been roped in to a furniture removal on Saturday. At 09:00 would you believe? Still, I’ll get up early if there is the folding stuff involved.

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Sunday 9th May 2010 – Well, I got my weather-guess horribly wrong.

I woke up this morning to the sound of the rain crashing (and I mean crashing) down on the roof and it was freezing cold. Whatever breeze had blown away the clouds last night had been replaced by a strong wind that had blown them back again.

You can make up your own mind about the weather – I’ll just tell you that in the 24 hours to 22:00 this evening we had 23.5mm of rain. That’s just over 120mm (almost 5 inches) since a week last Friday. Or to put it in more frightening terms, an average of 12mm per day.

From this pic taken at the footy you can just about make out the Font Nanaud (the mountain pass between Pionsat and Gouttieres) in the distance through the rain. That’s the horizontal grey line at about 2/3rds height. You can see the darker squall clouds such as the one hovering over the goal. My estimate was that this particular cloud was at about 150 feet.

This cloud was one of many being slowly blown across the football pitch by the wind, drenching everyone and everything in tons of water. It was horrible.

All of the players were wringing their shirts out every so often and the linesman from Beauregard Vendon was running the line with his umbrella – a sight that I have never seen before and one that I probably won’t ever see again.

As for the football, Pionsat lost 4-0. But it has to be said that firstly Beauregard Vendon are leading the division by a country mile and are unbeaten throughout the season and secondly Francois the goalkeeper was carried off the field with a leg injury after just three minutes of the game.

This deprived Pionsat of the goalkeeper and Christophe who was playing up front went into the goal thus depriving the team of the centre-forward. In those circumstances a defeat was always on the cards.

Apart from the weather, what else can I say?

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EPIC HALL

The Poisoned Pen (or Poisoned Chalice, more like) – or my relentless struggle against reality