… the dictaphone this morning, which is something of a disappointment. Not that it’s any surprise, of course, because if you don’t go to sleep, you can’t dream, can you? Well, I can, as events in the recent past have proved, but not many other people can manage it.
And it’s also looking very much like I’ll have nothing on tonight either, because Bane of Britain … "fool that he is" – ed … dropped both sets of his night attire into the washing machine this morning without thinking.
It’s also gone very cold in here now. I’ve put on a sweater today for the first time this end of the year. The temperature is definitely dropping, even as we speak. It looks like I’ll be wearing goose pimples through the night tonight rather than anything else.
So let’s go back to last night, when all of this seemed to start.
Last night, I fell asleep in my chair again while I was writing out my notes. I was out for a good hour, if not more, and when I awoke, I had to edit out all of the nonsense that I’d typed while I was asleep. However, I missed a line, and I bet it gave you all quite a laugh when you read it.
But when I did wake up, I was doing no good at all, so I posted on line what I had written, added a “To be Continued” sticker and went to bed.
Incidentally, you may find a “To be Continued” on this posting too, but that’s for another reason entirely. I’ve been watching a Welsh Cup match on the internet until quite late this evening.
However, as I have said before … "and on many occasions too" – ed … it’s a waste of time going to bed early, because all that it means is that you wake up correspondingly early the following morning. And that was definitely the case this morning.
Whatever time it was that I awoke, I have no idea. It was still dark, that’s for sure, and it stayed dark for ages. And when I was totally and utterly fed up with just lying there trying to go to sleep and failing, I checked the clock. It was 06:00, so I thought that I may as well claim an early start for once.
So, by the time that the alarm should have gone off, I’d organised myself … "as best as he could" – ed … in the bathroom, unlocked the front door for the nurse when he arrives, and was back in here having started work.
The first task was, of course, to finish off the notes from yesterday. There were piles to do, as you probably noticed, and I hadn’t quite finished when the nurse arrived, quite early again.
While he was sorting out my legs and feet, we had a chat about the weather and how it was going to cool down now over the next few days as we move closer to winter. And I have a feeling that it’s going to be a bad one this year.
After he left, I could make my breakfast and read some more of THE REPORT OF THE WOOLHOPE NATURALISTS CLUB 1870.
Our author is still talking about the famous trees of Herefordshire and, as far as I can tell, steering well clear of controversy for the moment. But not to worry, I’ll catch him out again one of these days.
When breakfast had finished, I went one better than David Crosby, probably because I’d had the ‘flu for Christmas and wasn’t feeling up to par. Consequently, I didn’t give in an inch to fear and went on the attack.
And “attack” it was, too. You have to go back to 6th July since the last time I was similarly engaged.
With that being out of the way, I turned my attention to the washing. Would you believe that I’m on my last pair of trousers – well, decent trousers anyway? So I collected up all of the dirty washing and put it in the machine to wash. These days, I can’t hang up the washing myself to dry, so if I do it on a Friday morning, my faithful cleaner hangs it up for me when she comes in the afternoon, and that helps me a lot.
Back in here afterwards, I had yesterday’s notes to finish, and now they are on line, all two thousand-odd words of them.
It’s a good job in a way that there was nothing on the dictaphone, otherwise I’d probably still be there now transcribing them. However, there were a few other things to do too, and by the time that they were all out of the way, it was time for my midday medication and disgusting drink.
There were the radio notes to start when I came back in here. I’d made a start the other day but I’d barely scratched the surface. And with several new groups and artists featuring in the programme. It would usually take much longer to research them than it does for artists who have featured before. That’s why I was rather apprehensive about whether I’d ever finish it or not.
So, if I don’t ever start, I won’t ever finish, so I made myself comfortable and then I began. And with some kind of superhuman effort, I’d actually finished a good while before the end of the afternoon, despite the interruption from the cleaner when she came in. Yes, I keep on forgetting about the power of artificial intelligence and my friendly neighbourhood chatbot who these days does most of my research for me.
There was even time for the two of us to come up with a list of albums released, musicians who were born and musicians who have died on the day that the following programme will be first broadcast. My “births, deaths and releases” file is pretty comprehensive, but my chatbot can dig deeper than I can.
However, that programme is going to be complicated because I usually play eleven records, but I have thirteen candidates for inclusion on that day.
Tea tonight was my usual Friday night tea – sausage, beans with cheese and black pepper, and air-fried chips. That’s a meal that I could eat even when I was right off my food. I seem to remember that I was living for a couple of months on porridge, toast and the aforementioned.
One thing that I still can’t manage, and I don’t know why, is my Sunday pizza. But who knows? That might make its reintroduction to the menu one of these weekends.
After the washing-up, I managed to make it back in here just in time for the kick-off off tonight’s football.
It’s the Welsh Cup Round Two this weekend, and tonight, the televised match is Llansawel v Afan United, a very lopsided first-tier v fourth tier game.
It beats me why this game was chosen to be televised when most people could already predict the result and when there are several much more competitive games being played elsewhere throughout the country. The least that can be said for it, I suppose, was that Afan United didn’t lie down and die.
In fact, they had a game plan and they stuck pretty much to it, even if the Llansawel goalkeeper didn’t have much to do. And I was also impressed by the speed of Afan United’s two forwards, even if they were far too lightweight for this level of competition.
And a word must be said for Afan United’s goalkeeper, Liam Sheehy. He might have been a bit shaky at the start, and his team did concede five goals, but as the game went on and his nerves settled, he had an outstanding game, made several crucial saves and even saved a penalty.
So he and the rest of his teammates can walk off the field with their heads held high, especially as this is probably the first time they’ve ever played in front of a large four-figure crowd.
Tonight’s match should be much more competitive, and played on a better pitch too. It’s a repeat of last season’s cup final between Y Fflint and Caernarfon. Caernarfon’s form has been somewhat erratic of late, and Y Fflint, who always play nice football, have a new manager who has already ushered them to two victories.
Although the match didn’t finish until 22:45, I attacked today’s notes. However, I only made it so far before fatigue caught up with me. I didn’t crash out, despite the very short night’s sleep last night, but it was on its way, so I posted up as far as I had gone and went to bed. I could finish off the rest of it tomorrow morning.
But before I go, seeing as we have been talking about having nothing on … "well, one of us has" – ed … the local nudists in South Cheshire used to (I don’t know if they still do) hire one of the local night clubs in Nantwich one evening to walk around, dance, socialise and generally display their wares.
One night, I was driving my taxi around Nantwich when a girl, as naked as the day she was born, stepped out of the shadows and flagged me down. "Take me to Crewe" she said.
So there I was, sitting there, and not being able to take my eyes off her, even for a moment.
"What’s the matter with you?" she asked. "Surely you’ve seen a naked woman before!"
"It’s not that" I replied. "I’m just wondering where you’re keeping the money to pay me."

















