Tag Archives: claude

Wednesday 7th April 2010 – Think of a phrase that contains …

… the words “booze-up” and “brewery” – and we aren’t talking about the Open University Students’ Association either!

Yes, I thought that incompetence at its most stunning inefficiency could only be reached in the hands of that august body but I am fast changing my opinion. I have been reliably informed by one of my “moles on various committees” that this week’s radio programme was the one for the 1st week of March – the radio station appears to have thrown the wrong version onto the cutting room floor and gone with the one we discarded which is now 5 weeks out of date.

And that isn’t all either. I’ve been given a task to undertake by the footy club which requires them to send in a form. So I’ve been waiting 3 weeks and it’s not made it there yet. I obtained a duplicate and I rang up the President of the club about completing it – the deadline is Friday – but I got the answerphone so I left a message.

No callback by the time I went to training, so never mind – I’ll see the President’s son down at the ground. But down at the ground there were just 4 of us, and we were locked out of the stadium. It appears that the trainer has given the players the night off so that they can watch the footy on the box.

Unbelievable, isn’t it? Last Wednesday they were rained off; last Friday was someone’s birthday; today there’s something better on the box. And all the teams are struggling right now and need a change of fortune. Fitness is a big issue with the teams – watch them drop off the pace in the last 15 minutes – but the trainer cancels the training session. Stand by for a right spannering on Saturday and Sunday.

I did a couple of laps around the field and then came home. The President eventually rang me back at 21:00 and I explained the situation. “I’ll ring up the secretary right now and call you straight back”. It’s now 02:30 and guess what?

But it’s not all doom and gloom. You remember my action photo from the footy 10 days ago? Well the local rag has published it. It might only be La Montagne but it’s still nice to see my name in lights and it’s another addition to the portfolio. And Claude came back from his holiday in the Midi so we had coffee on the terrasse. We could do that because there was a moment when the rain stopped. After me crowing about the good weather yesterday it p155ed down for most of the day. But in between the showers I dug out a few more treestumps.

Tomorrow morning I’ll be starting to build the new megacloche. The afternoon will be spent at a talk on the history of the area of La Cellette. Marianne wants me to meet the organiser.

And 02:30 in the morning? This 3D program has taken hold of me. My two characters have now made it to the beach with a herd of wild rhinocerous hot on their heels. I shall be scanning the world-wide web tomorrow evening to see if I can find a freeware boat otherwise my little animation will come to a premature end.

-2

IMPORTANT NOTE: From 1 September 2026 this blog has a live blog feature for the latest news. Click any post title with "LIVE" in it to see live updates. Comments are welcome from logged-in users and must be approved before they appear.

Saturday 20th March 2010 – One thing about the warm weather that we are having…

… is that the footy can recommence. And in the balmy spring weather we had two matches tonight. The 2nd XI played Neuf-Eglise and ground out a 0-0 draw. The second half particularly seemed to go on on for ever and I think that most of the supporters had fallen asleep by the final whistle – I know that I had

The second match was against Artonne and keen followers of my blog may recall the away match back in November which was controversial in the extreme, to say the least. It was refereed by the ref who had the attack of the hysterics against the Miners back in October so fireworks would be guaranteed, one would have thought.

But instead we had a lamb-like performance from everyone(except the Pionsat no14 who was sent off for two yellow cards) and Pionsat ran out 2-0 winners. I don’t think anyone was expecting that.

For the rest of today, nothing much happened. I did my shopping in St Eloy and didn’t get anything out of the ordinary, except for the seeds I was missing. I went round to see Claude and Francoise but they weren’t there. According to the neighbour they’d gone down to the South of France for a week to see Sandrine, their daughter. Hmmmm.

I did encounter Bob from Montaigut. He’s a Brit and managed to get a job with a French company as an employee. I managed to persuade him to come onto our radio programme some time and talk to us about the French working environment.

And that was that, really.

+11

-6

Tuesday 16th March 2010 – Well, I moved the greenhouse!

This is where it will be staying for the foreseeable future, gale-force winds permitting.

I had to dig out six tree stumps and that tookabsolutely ages. I broke the handle on my pickaxe but luckily Claude (Laurence’s father that is) many years ago gave me a kind of digging axe and I put a shaft into it, and that came in really handy. There was a whole warren of tree roots under there and they took some moving.

This afternoon I had to dig over the patch a few times ( and that wore me out) and then dig out the greenhouse from where it used to be, in front of the verandah. In fact the empty space there makes a nice place to put my outdoor table and chairs. I rounded off the day by chopping wood but I really didn’t need it as it was an absolutely beautiful day today. The warmest so far this year an I had 270amp-hours (over 3KwH) of electricity – enough to run the electric heater in here for 5 hours and the temperature up here reached 18.6 degrees.

Tomorrow if the weather keeps on going I’ll be moving the cloche and making the first of the raised beds – you can see one of the shuttering planks leaning up against the Cortina.

-9

Saturday 13th March 2010 – What a night!

If you remember about a year ago I had a series of nights where I had some really bad attacks of cramp in bed. Last night I had another. I can’t think of anything more painful than that and in stretching my legs out to ease the pain I pulled mycalf muscles -both of them! It took ages for the pain to subside and another age for me to go back to sleep. No wonder I didn’t wake up until after 10:00.

I hope that this isn’t a portent for another series of attacks like last year.

I finally made it off to St Eloy for the shopping and spent quite a few bob there today. LIDL’s gardening sale was ongoing and I bought a 1.5×10-metre roll of black plastic mulching. My new raised beds are to be 1.5×1.5metres so I’ll cut this roll to size, make up a handy framework and use it in winter to keep out the weeds. Carrefour also had a gardening sale so I bought some seeds and a new lopper – €12.99 which is three times the price at LIDL but I hope it lasts 3 times longer. The LIDL ones have a weak spot, the aluminium jaw plate, but these don’t have that – just a simple scissor mechanism.

I popped round to see the European Cardboard Box Mountain that is Claude and Francoise’s apartment to see how they were all doing there, and then the final visit was to the new tyre place. They were advertising Caliburn-sized tyres for €70 each which isn’t too bad a price but by the time they had added on the valves, the balancing, the fitting and the VAT it came to almost €200 for a pair. I’m thinking that I may as well get the Goodyear tyres that were the original fitting seeing as they are only €50 extra for a pair all-in. One thing is certain – I’m not going to waste my snow tyres by running them through the summer. They’ve been invaluable in this weather.

+11

-7

Saturday 27th February 2010 – I had a quiet day today.

Up early enough and then after breakfast I did a few rearrangements downstairs and then came up here to catch up on some correspondence.

Lunchtime saw me head into St Eloy and shopping. There was nothing exciting at LIDL and so apart from the usual necessities my hands stayed in my pocket. I went to see the European Cardboard Box Mountain otherwise known as Claude’s new apartment and made sure that he and Francoise were ok.

This afternoon I went to the mairie to see the mayor. I’m a firm believer in turning things to my advantage and what with the Parisian being up to no good and the roadmaking project for Claude’s barn I’ll get my parking spaces yet! No harm in turning the screw a little.

This evening Guus and Lieneke came round. They are going back to the Netherlands tomorrow and so I invited them to have some birthday cake. They bought me a little birthday present which was quite nice of them.

And that was that really. No football so I haven’t done anything else.

-7

Friday 26th February 2010 – I knew I’d pay for yesterday.

Yes, I wasn’t feeling anything like it today. But then again thats what usually happens so I have to make the most of it.

I started again on cutting the wood but not as quickly as yesterday. And I was interrupted for an hour or so by Claude who came round to visit, with two important pieces of news.
Firstly Beethoven has died. And that’s devastating news. He was an Old English Sheepdog and had reached the age of 16 with all his faculties more-or-less intact although he did have to burrow under the fence to escape after the young lady dogs of the area rather than leap over it as he used to in his youth. He had bags of character and was the only dog I ever took to. However this last few weeks he had developed an ulcer on his nether regions that turned out to be a cancer. The vet had given him antibiotics but it seemed that they failed to work.
The second piece of news is much more exciting. Claude hasn’t sold all his land here – he’s still kept the plot down in the forest with the ruined barn. And he tells me that yesterday when he was up here doing something or other at his old property he heard a chainsaw in the forest. So off he wandered – and caught the Parisian in flagrante delicto cutting down one of Claude’s trees. And who should be strolling down the lane right at that moment but one of the mayor’s assistants. Claude and the Parisian hate each other with a passion that goes off the Richter Scale – and I have to say that I find the Parisian gratuitously disagreeable, and catching him red-handed with an impeccable witness in attendance is an answer to Claude’s dreams. From here on in, the matter is sub judice, as you might say.

I went round to see my new neighbours as well to bid them welcome and to offer them a bottle of wine as a housewarming present.There’s no harm whatever in laying the good foundations of friendship. They are Dutch and have moved here permanently so I told them about the Anglo-French group and the activities of the Reseau Rural – even though I don’t get on with the organisers of the Reseau as regular readers will know, I still support the aims of the organisation and give it all the encouragement I can.

In other news, the first buds are coming out on the trees.

-4

Tuesday 23rd February 2010 – I once knew a girl ….

…. called Summer (she had a sister called Sky – you have to feel sorry for kids with parents like that) and she had a boyfriend who was absolutely devoted to her. They used to have their own private little moments and like all teenagers they would get up to no good – in one particular way that pleased the young gentleman greatly.

After a while Summer moved on to pastures new and the young gentleman (whose name I forget) was devastated. No subsequent girlfriend that he found could make up for what he had lost. One day he confided in a girlfriend exactly what it was that made his relationship with Summer so special.
“That’s no big deal” she replied. “i have no inhibitions about that”
So a short while later, right after one of these private moments, she turned to him and said
“Has that helped you rekindle some of your enthusiasm for life?”
“Well” he replied, “one swallow doesn’t make a Summer”.

And that’s really the story of what has happened here this last few days. The temperature has warmed up dramatically and it’s feeling warm. I told you the other day about the temperature in the verandah. Yesterday it reached 30.6 degrees which is the highest total since October 30th.

Today though was not so impressive. The morning was fine and I finished round by Claude’s at 13:45. It’s sad to see the fruits of their 46 years of married life end up like this but age and ill-health catch up with everyone sooner or later. I got back the two huge armoured cupboards that I gave him back in 2002. He also gave me two kitchen unit bases – the 600mm size – and I’m going to put them upstairs in the barn with a plank or two across the top to make a joinery bench, using the two large cupboards to store my tools, nails, screws and the like. I’m glad I put a trapdoor in the barn floor when I redid it, so that I can lift stuff up and down.

This afternoon I carried on in the garden but the torrential rain that fell later on drove me inside. I continued with the insulation on the bedroom wall for a while until the light went – this torrential rainfall (we had 9mm in minutes) plotted everything out.

And the Parisian is nosing around the ruined house by here and hacking away at the undergrowth. He’s up to something, my nasty suspicious little mind tells me, and I wonder what it is. He had a whinge about the Passat and the Escort blocking the track. He’s right but there’s nothing much I can do about this until the local Mayor pulls his finger out and does something about my proposition about buying the communal land round here. I suppose I’d better go and have a chat to him on Saturday.

-5

Monday 22 February 2010 – Only one more day …

…and this furniture removal will be over. And I can’t say that I’m sorry either. Today we took the final two loads to the new flat in St Eloy and then afterwards the first of the loads to the dechetterie. And just for a change the guy who was working there was extremely helpful and did his best to sort us out, including getting his own hands dirty.

But amongst the rubble set aside for the next visit to the tip (the first one of tomorrow) was an incredible find. Long-term readers of my ramblings will recall the discovery at the Montaigut brocante in the summer of 2008 of a parabolic heater attachment for the 920 series of Camping Gas bottles, together with an almost-full bottle. In the rubbish for the tip was a cooker attachment for the 920 series of bottles, complete with an almost-full bottle. I have issues about standardisation when I’m living in Caliburn and I’ve been trying to settle on a heater and cooker system that uses the same gas bottles. I’ve had to resort to those tube canister things with a stove and heater but they aren’t all that satisfactory. But with this find to go with the heater, I’m now set up exactly as I want.

Lieneke is here too and I went for a chat with her after I finished with Claude. It’s nice to see her again and we had a good old chinwag. after that I came home and lit the fire in the woodstove and got a nice roaring blaze after many tribulations. But then someone called me on the phone and kept me chatting for ages and the blasted thing went out.

+10

-6

Friday 19th February 2010 -This furniture removal is wearing me out.

I’m clearly not as young as I was. Today was the heavy stuff, and heavy it certainly was. And I’m not sure what is worse, running up and down the stairs a few dozen times with a pile of loaded cardboard boxes, or struggling up and down stairs half a dozen times with some enormous and heavy furniture. I broke both my knees in a motorbike accident when I was 17 and today I was feeling every single one of the splinters.

At least the weather was fine and the view was spectacular out towards the north.

Later this afternoon I came back and crashed out. It’s clearly getting to me and I shan’t be sorry when it’s finished.

I’ve discovered the secret of why grandfather’s chair is following her around in all of her many removals. Apparently her grandfather and her father both died in it. I told Claude that if ever Francoise tells him to sit in it then he knows his days are numbered.

-4

Wednesday 17th February 2010 – The sky this morning …

… was magnificent. There were plenty of heavy grey clouds meaning that everything was in superb relief and it’s a pity that I am decent-cameraless right now as the Fuji can’t do justice to the situation. It’s impossible to get a decent zoom onto the Puy de Dome from my favourite spot near St Gervais.

We all were in St Gervais to open a bank account for our property empire. The bank was exceedingly helpful and did it without any difficulties although yet another rainforest was sacrificed. The manager gave us a few handy tips about creating a Limited Company-type of affair.

We also discussed the scaffolding hire and the cheques-service (you’ll be hearing more about these in due course) and it is just so complicated. You need to create so many different types of enterprise to do all of what we want to do. No wonder there is so much “black economy” in France – I think that most people have good intentions but they are simply submerged in red tape so they give up.

After lunch ( a Liz-special lentil soup) I rescued the Sankey trailer and then went round to Claude’s with Terry to do another leg of this removal. By now the rain was p155ing down and much of the snow has gone and I’m up to my knees in morass again.

Next moving day is Friday so tomorrow I’ll be doing some more on my wall.

+10

-11

Sunday 14th February 2010 – We’ve still got tons of snow …

… even if nothing much has fallen within the last 24 hours. I only had to breathe on the solar panels and the light scattering of snow blew away. Hot stuff am I, what?

So after a … errr … leisurely breakfast I came back up here and swotted up on French building permits and so on. I can tell you everything that there is to know about it – including the fact that I can erect a statue of 11.99 metres height and 39.99 cubic metres volume in my garden without planning permission! Dunno about you but my imagination is working overtime. Just think of it – Turdi de Hatred, Caligula and Her Horse, Pol Pot’s Sibling, Andy Pandy and Aunt Ada Doom (and whatsisname that she saw in the woodshed) 11.99 metres high and right next to the beichstuhl! I could have hours of endless fun with all of that.

Works of art are also covered by that exemption and that gives me enormous scope. When you think of Tracey Eminem’s unmade bed being exhibited at the Hate Gallery I’m sure that my verandah and its contents would be covered by this. And when you think that the disorder that I can create even in an empty room, well just imagine it – “no, this object 11.99 metres high and 39.99 cubic metres volume is not a new house – it’s next year’s hot favourite for the Turnip Prize!” In any case, anything that I ever build is certainly a work of art and people come from miles around to gaze in bewilderment at my efforts.

This afternoon I went down to Liz and Terry’s to discuss this programme. Julie should have come with me (she’s our first guest) but she’s snowed (or rather iced) in. This is one of the perils that you have to risk when you buy a house by a bridge alongside a river – the only way out is upwards and with the gorges around here being so steep, if they don’t grit the roads then you are stuck.

So I went on my own instead – but not that I minded, it just meant more vegan fruit cake for me! Down to Pionsat was … errr … interesting but the D227 between Pionsat and St Gervais was clear even over the Font Nanaud. From St Gervais to Liz and Terry’s was also exciting.

So having done what we could I came back. And that was even more exciting as it was trying to snow down there. But I encountered two snowplough-gritters so they are taking it seriously for Monday morning’s commuter traffic. It’s also forecast bright sunny weather too for tomorrow but as you know I have my suspicions about that kind of thing.

And Claude’s removal is postponed again. His son never came up and so nothing has been packed. They’ll be running out of time at this rate.

+10

-4

Tuesday 9th February 2010 – This radio programme is taking shape

We were out at the SMADC offices today – the SMADC being something like Syndicat Mixte pour l’Amenagement et Developpement des Combrailles – where we discussed our tactics for the radio programme. Christian was there with his floozy and I was there with Liz. I have plenty of ideas and Liz approves of them and as far as the SMADC and the radio station go, then I don’t imagine that they will care less as long as we do it.

Apart from that, this morning I cracked on with my plasterboarding and it’s all but finished now. All I need to do now is to join things up with the tape and then fill over it. Of course I have put my jointing tape somewhere safe – so safe in fact that I can’t find it now. That’s a badger! But as soon as I find it and tape things up I can start to do the ceiling – with tongue-and-grooving. I can do that on my own and I don’t have any inhibitions as to how it’ll look.

And Claude came round. Yesterday finished him off for good and he wants to pause until Monday. He’s getting his son up over the weekend to move the heavy objects ready for us to load on Monday. But on Monday Terry is giving blood, Tuesday Liz and I are in studio and on Wednesday we are all at the bank. This timetable for moving Claude is shrinking rapidly.

-8

Monday 8th February 2010 – We started on Claude’s removal today

And so well did we do it and so well did we pack the vans that everything that was prepared for today was in the vans with space to spare on the first load and we had to go scratching around for stuff to make the trip worthwhile. And it’s amazing just how much stuff you can pack into a couple of Ford Transits.

For the second load we took the fitted kitchen that had been hawked all around the South of France and is destined to be hawked all the way back there again even though it has seen far better days , and also another huge pile of boxes. The thing that worries me in all of this is that this is the end of day One (we finished after the two loads because there was nothing else ready to take) out of Five and the apartment is pretty full. By the end of day Five I’m just wondering how Claude and Francoise will be able to fit in there.

Tomorrow is a day off as Liz and I are going to see the guy from SMADC to talk to him about building permits in France. That’s going to be the subject of our first radio programme. It’ll give Claude and Francoise a chance to pack up some more stuff (if they stop throwing boxes at each other) so that on Wednesday we can have a really good go at this moving lark.

-6

Sunday 7th February 2010 – We’re back in the usual routine.

A nice lie-in on Sunday morning interrupted by a torrential downpour. So out of bed by 09:45 (which is early for me as you know) and breakfast followed by tidying up the verandah. After that it was back up here and try out the new power supply for the old Lenovo that gave up the ghost back in the summer. Hunting around the other day for a replacement I came across one on eBay at a grand total of £7.45 plus £3.50 postage. And much to mysurprise it actually works! So now I can recover the data that wasn’t included in the last back-up.

This afternoon it was down to St Eloy to watch Pionsat’s 1st XI play the Miners. And they lost 4-1. Mind you the scoreline is a totally unfair reflection of the result and they were so unlucky – they hit the woodwork three times. But in truth they offered litttle up front with no Cedric, even though the Nord Combraille goalkeeper was a pretty busy man rushing out after all of these through-balls. Pionsat had a patched-up defence and an injury to Yann made things even worse. By the time the final whistle went, Pionsat’s back-line consisted of Gregory the left-winger playing at left-back, Sebastien who plays midfield for the 2nd XI at centre-half partnered by Pierre from Brico-Depot who usually plays on the right wing, and someone who I had never seen before playing at right-back. Nevertheless it was a really good match and I quite enjoyed it despite the scoreline. Two of Nord Combraille’s goals were absolute peaches.

That wood-burning boiler that Terry bought does not weigh 270 kilos. In fact it weighs in at well over 300 and it’s blasted heavy and awkward. But with the aid of two scaffolding planks and a carpet we got it into the kitchen. It’s just as well as it’s Claude-moving starting tomorrow and Terry’s van needs to be empty!

+10

-9

Thursday 4th February 2010 – We had a really good go at Terry’s kitchen floor today.

After we emptied the kitchen we set out to do the tiling. We had something of a production line going, with Terry measuring, me cutting and shaping and then him laying. As well as that, I was mixing and carrying.

And it’s amazing but once you get into a rhythm it’s amazing just how much you can do and we would have had it finished if the light and the weather had held up.

Of course there were lentilburgers involved in this, and also vegan chocolate cake so I am well-satisfied with today.

After tea we sat and synchronised our diaries. The lengths that we are having to go to now that things seem to be moving around here. I don’t know where I’m going to find the time to fit it all in.

But one job we can delete from the list for the moment is Claude’s removal. They switched on the water and the gas this afternoon in his new apartment and the boiler exploded. So “don’t call us – we’ll call you”.

-7

EPIC HALL

The Poisoned Pen (or Poisoned Chalice, more like) – or my relentless struggle against reality

Tag Archives: claude

Wednesday 7th April 2010 – Think of a phrase that contains …

Saturday 20th March 2010 – One thing about the warm weather that we are having…

Tuesday 16th March 2010 – Well, I moved the greenhouse!

Saturday 13th March 2010 – What a night!

Saturday 27th February 2010 – I had a quiet day today.

Friday 26th February 2010 – I knew I’d pay for yesterday.

Tuesday 23rd February 2010 – I once knew a girl ….

Monday 22 February 2010 – Only one more day …

Friday 19th February 2010 -This furniture removal is wearing me out.

Wednesday 17th February 2010 – The sky this morning …

Sunday 14th February 2010 – We’ve still got tons of snow …

Tuesday 9th February 2010 – This radio programme is taking shape

Monday 8th February 2010 – We started on Claude’s removal today

Sunday 7th February 2010 – We’re back in the usual routine.

Thursday 4th February 2010 – We had a really good go at Terry’s kitchen floor today.

Your reactions

Excellent

Useful

Interesting

Weird

Surprising

Boring